cathwood’s thread got me to thinking: I’m sure we’ve all heard the tired shouts like “Hey, where’s your other wheel?” and “I think you got ripped off when you bought that bike.”
What other witty quips have been hurled, tossed, or otherwise cast your way? And what are you favorite responses?
–RB
good idea, but it’s already been done, quite to everyone’s amusement
i’m sure you’d enjoy giving this a read:
http://www.unicyclist.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=38668&highlight=best+comments
Yes,theres been a bunch of threads like this,but most of them are the"worst" comments.
I had a really stupid ones the other day.I was jumping onto a becn when these kids on bikes rode by(ages 11-12 maybe) yelling stuff like " holy crap" and “can you DO that”?the usual.
but the worst was a kid who asked me"hey,can you jump in that garabage right there"?pointing to a pile of trash on the ground.
Not knowing what to say,I just stood there,then they stared riding off,another one said,"thats a tricycle,right?"To wich I said sarcasticly,"no,are those tricycles?"pointing to they’re bikes.
“no,its a BIKE stupid”!
Yeah,DUMB ASS"
was the reply.
oops…sorry about the duplicate topic…guess I’d oughtta do a bit of reading before posting…hehe…gulp…
Can’t help but go ahead and leave these gems, tho:
yeah…finally got a MUni so am looking forward to the comments on the trails. Tried out the trails a month or so ago with my street uni and a friend on his MUni. We came upon a kid riding the other way who asked “Why are you riding a unicycle?”, apparently under the belief that they were either unethical or unlawful on trails. I just chuckled, realizing later that I should have asked why he was riding a bicycle.
My fav, tho, has to be when we were out juggling and unicycling all together with the KU Juggling club on their campus. Had a car drive by and someone shout out, “Get a girlfriend!” That needs to be on a t-shirt.
My favourite has to be that which makes up my signature line, riding through central oxford:
Man: a unicycle
Me:Umm, yes
Him: i didnt realise people rode unicycles in oxford
me:well yes they do
him:what a throughly post-modern subversion of the cycling genre
word for word, i swear
Dave
incidently i got the ‘are you saving up for the other half?’ from a middle aged man last week and replied, ‘are you kidding? this costs alot more than a bike’
I prefer the comebacks threads. Originally we posted a list of them in the USA Newsletter in 1981 or so (Snappy Comebacks to Stupid Remarks). The idea is not to embarrass the person, but to say something clever back that lets them know you’ve heard their “original” comment before.
Examples from the posts above:
Where’s your other wheel? - On my other unicycle.
I think you got ripped off when you bought that bike. - If I’d thought this was a bike, I deserved to get ripped off!
can you DO that? - No. It’s totally impossible, and don’t ever try it.
hey,can you jump in that garabage right there? - You first.
thats a tricycle,right? - No, surely you know what a tricycle is?
Why are you riding a unicycle? - Because it’s fun! (not the most clever response, but it’s what I use)
Get a girlfriend! - How about a boyfriend, cutie? (that usually gets them to leave fast. I agree, it would be good on a T-shirt.)
What a throughly post-modern subversion of the cycling genre. - Exactly!
Are you saving up for the other half? - This is the other half (goes with ‘This is my other wheel’ for ‘Where’s your other wheel?’)
Those are just single examples. You can come up with a whole list for each one, which was what that 1981 article did. Mostly it was a list for ‘Where’s your other wheel?’
Some girle thaught it was called a unibrow one time. Another time my brother amd I where riding and some guy yelled out “Do a wheelie!”
When they say “do a wheelie,” I either say that I’m already doing one or if I’m in the mood to humor them I do a little hop. 
I got “You better pray you don’t get a puncture”, What like with a bike you’ve got a spare wheel you can use if you get a puncture in the other one?
It never worked that way when I was riding a b**e.
Cathy
Several of us (8) were riding trails on Saturday when we met 2 women riding bicycles in the opposite direction. We stopped to let them pass and they stopped to ask about our unicycles. One of them was looking at our variety of unicycles when she noticed my 3" MUni tire and asked why it was so fat. Someone in the uni group replied that it was for “downhill” riding. She believed him.
I always love the looks I get while I’m hopping around - not that I can do much more than seat-in hopping up stairs just yet, but people don’t expect it from a guy on a unicycle 
also, this conversation always amuses me:
Dave: “Unicycle unicycle unicycle unicycle something something MUni.”
Other Person: “MUni?”
Dave: “Yeah, you know, Mountain Unicycling.”
Other Person: “Mountain Unicycling?!”
Then I tell them about the posts people have made here about hardcore mountain bikers telling them they’re nuts.
Cokers and big wheel descriptions tend to get a 
out of people too. heheh.
I got a “hey faggot burn in hell” on a late night ride on my 29er it was great. I also seem to get a lot of “look at that bicycle it has one wheel” haha people are morons.
Yeah. I never saw someone riding a bike with the flat tire in the air or something like that.
Oddly enough, my artistic bike (2 wheels) had a flat just before my show yesterday. By the time I figured out it was a cut in the valve stem and not a valve problem, there was no time to fix it before showtime. Oh well, the folks in downtown Modesto were treated to a unicycle show with nothing but unicycles! Except my Coker Mini Monster, which I rode about 20’ at the beginning…
Get a regular bike!
I was riding the bike path along the Hudson River in NYC yesterday when a group of bikes came the other way and one of them said, “Get a regular bike!”
The punch line (and why this is a good-natured, funny comment and not a bad one)… he was riding a recumbent bike (his friends were all riding “regular” bikes). There wasn’t time for a reply.
Later, another biker simply said, “Impressive.”
And a few people just giggled or laughed without saying anything.
Just another day in the life of a reluctant spectacle .
people usually call me a “clown” or “circus freak”. it’s getting annoying
While on a group Coker ride around Green Lake in Seattle I heard the following comment:
“You should ride those naked in the Fremont Parade”
First time I’ve been asked to get naked on a unicycle.
Every year the neighborhood of Fremont in Seattle holds a Summer Solstice Parade. It’s in June and about a month away. Fremont is the artsy artisty part of Seattle. Things are different over there. Every year there is a group of people who paint on body paint, get on their bikes, and ride the parade route naked. It’s artsy, not obscene. That’s just how they do things in Fremont. I’d link to info and pictures about the parade but some of the pictures are NSFW. If you’re good with Google you can find them easily enough.
Solstice Parade
Excuse me while I hijack the thread:
Who here in Seattle’s going to be in the Fremont solstice parade?
John, I would expect you would get some serious ball itch if you rode naked in body paint! Imagine this and you will have nightmares for the next two weeks:
6 foot drop to concrete, naked, with a Savage saddle, on a solid tire, while sitting on your “stuff”…
They didn’t notice you were in the group, John.
I have only gotten one of the “are you a faggot/queer/gay” or some such intended deragatory comments. I simply said, “no,” and asked them why they were looking for homosexual males.
Re: Solstice Parade
I’m not going to be in the parade. In fact, I’ve never even been to the Fremont Solstice Parade. I always seem to have something else to do that weekend (like a muni ride). One of these years I’ll get around to experiencing the parade.