I wrote:
The problem isn’t that other people start to think when they see you riding. The problem is also not that some of them speak out their thoughts. The problem is your reaction to this.
Cathy wrote:
A thought is just a thought.
Absolutely. And this has really made me think about what we psychologists say to our clients and what we expect them to do. Because what you said to me is exactly what I say explicitly or implicitly to my clients. And I didn’t like it very much.
Food for thought indeed. Thank you. Because the stones still remain.
Cathy
There is a serious philosophical point here, and as someone who aspires towards stoicism and sometimes tries to step back and see the world in existentialist terms, I ought to be able to handle the situation better. Cathwood, as a psychologist might see the detail differently, but her discipline ought to push her in the same general direction.
We cannot change how other people act, but we can learn to react differently. That is true, whether you look at a problem in cognitive behavioural terms (I understand how and why I am feeling and behaving in a given way, and can therefore work towards changing that) or in stoical terms (I cannot control the outside world, but I can make myself so that my happiness is independent of the outside word) or in existentialist terms (it is for me to choose how to behave, and thus to define the proper reaction to a situation).
However, all of these approaches ignore the fact that in any sort of ordered society we ought to be able to expect a certain minimal standard of behaviour from other people.
Taking these arguments to extremes, for the purpose of illustration, we might say, “I cannot stop this person raping my sister, or smashing my face with a brick, but I can control my reaction to that event.” Brilliant, but that doesn’t make it acceptable that someone rapes your sister or smashes your face with a brick.
So we have a situation in which we choose to do a minority sport, and a certain minority of people feel entitled to make adverse comment - sometimes in an aggressive or hostile manner. Yes, we should be able to rise above it, understand them, ignore them… but that still doesn’t stop it taking the edge off our enjoyment of the activity.
Complaining about human stupidity is like a sailor complaining about the sea.
I can exclusively reveal that sailors do complain about the sea.
Re: I got to be one of THEM!
On Thu, 13 Oct 2005 02:12:35 -0500, goldenchicken II wrote:
>Think of it as a skill among others you have to learn.
I’m not into psychology or philosophy so a lot of the reasoning in
this thread (solipsism, existentialist, stoical etc) goes over my
head. But intuitively I like goldenchicken II’s point of view: “Think
of it as a skill among others you have to learn”.
If you begin to MUni after you have mastered basic riding, you will
encounter bumps in your path. Chances are that you will be thrown off
your unicycle. You may not like it, but it’s recommended that you try
and stay upright next time. Handling bumps is a skill you have to
learn for MUni. Once you can, you’ll enjoy the bumps. Alternatively,
you might have made an attempt to flatten the path by some shovel work
but most probably that wouldn’t feel right. Firstly, there are too
many paths with bumps, and secondly, who are you to dictate what the
path should be like? Moreover, you would miss out on the final
pleasure of riding over bumps.
If you begin riding unicycles in public, you will get comments thrown
at you, positive and negative. Chances are that you are bothered by
them. You may not like it, but it’s recommended that you take them
lightheartedly. Handling comments is a skill you have to learn for
riding a unicycle in public. Once you can, you’ll enjoy the positive
comments, and you shrug at the negative ones. (You may even come to
learn that for some comments it is open to interpretation whether they
are positive or negative, and interpreting them as positive is more
rewarding.) Alternatively, you might have made an attempt to educate
people on what to say but most probably that wouldn’t feel right.
Firstly, there are too many people who utter comments, and secondly,
who are you to dictate how people should react? Moreover, you would
miss out on the final pleasure of dealing with comments and
compliments.
“dit dit diddle diddle dit dit did-it, dit dit diddle diddle dit dit did-it, dit diddle dit dit dit diddle dit dit, diddle-diddle-diddle-diddle-dit dit diddle diddle dit dit did-it,… - Spudman”
Klaas,
If that makes you feel more comfortable and is your chosen way of dealing with it, that’s fine.
My chosen way of dealing with it is to feel uncomfortable and continue to complain about it on this forum. It is, after all an integral part of the experience of unicycling. I still don’t think that people should throw stones at me just because I unicycle though. Your point of view doesn’t help me to deal with that.
Cathy
That’s really sad. If you couldn’t help feeling uncomfortable, well I can imagine that. But why would you choose to feel uncomfortable?
Having said that (and implying a certain freedom for people to comment on someone unicycling), I too disapprove of throwing stones at people just because they unicycle. Fortunately, it never happened to me, but I think my chosen way of dealing with this would either be to flee from the scene, or to get angry.
I tried to help, but I don’t think I can, and I feel sorry for it.
Have a nice weekend,
Klaas
Thanks Klaas,
I appreciate it.
Cathy
perhaps you should breath fire on them… just a thought, I wouldn’t be throwing no stones at a chick on a unicycle that breaths fire at me. But then i wouldn’t throw stones at a regular unicyclist either…
I actually enjoy that circus song and join in also… for some reason when I have ppl watching me I ride better with fewer mistakes…
But like my wife always tells me with riding my uniclycle %80 of the reason I do it is cause I like the attention.
Ahhhh, are y’all talking about the Circus Afro song? I love that song! That’s my happy song, but not the old school version. I like the one from the Madagascar movie.
Ahhhh, this is an ancient topic. Most of the posters are not active anymore. Except for good ol’ @system. Oh, well. I still think Circus Afro makes a great unicycle song, and so does Smokey Robinson’s Tears Of A Clown.
For a more Cosmopolitan sound I think Clocks by Coldplay would make a great unicycling song.
Oh, that wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I still like Circus Afro better.
So do I, but people don’t sing/hum/whistle that at us
You do know that they have a unicycle in one of their videos as the singer can ride one?
Oh. I doubt that would bother me though. After being called every name in the book for 56 years, I don’t sweat the small stuff.
Really? No, I didn’t know that. I only saw 2 of their videos. I didn’t see a unicycle in those.
