I just brushed my teeth with soap

a friend of mine drank some bleach to pass a drug test. he says it worked.

You can go ahead and try it. Im calling BS on think one.

well i’m pretty sure he really did try it, diluted of course. and he really passed the drug test. but i think he passed more because he waited so long to take the test. the job interview people told him he was supposed to take the test that same day, not whenever he got around to it.

I hear you. Still, no harm in asking.
I avoid drinking and driving as much as I can and drive with a unicycle on my back seat the rest of the time. I’m quite confident that I can talk my way out of a breathalyzer test by offering to ride a uni as a sobriety test.
And I checked, I can ride when I’m wa-a-asted.

A friend of mine uses an old tequila bottle (sans labels) to keep cold water in the fridge.
It was only a matter of time…