I always thought that this problem would eventually sort itself out one way or the other and a surgical solution would become unnecessary after a couple of long rides or bad drops. I recently upgraded from a Torker LX to a Nimbus. I was amazed that I could not feel my balls on the Nimbus! And I can’t even freemount yet!
I just can’t think of a good come-back comment except for, “Ew!” 
whoa…alert…i didnt know ed hardy and unicycling mixed. ed hardy is more of fixie thing, or extreme scootering, not uniing
Something I’ve been experimenting with is using a plastic “catchers cup” with soft rubber along the sides (the old ones were just HARD plastic). I took a Dremel tool and removed most of the plastic, leaving just the rubber frame attached to enough plastic to maintain it’s shape. I rode with it yesterday and it shows promise.
If you don’t remove the plastic your balls are protected but you can’t feel the seat. Plus, it feels like you are sitting on a rock.
Unfortunately, what works for one does not work for all. Your mileage may vary.
This was a more serious issue when I was new at riding than it is now. If I ride for a not-too-long distance, my stuff somehow arranges itself nowadays. No idea how it learned to do that. On a longer ride, I want everything to be perfect down under. What works for me is sitting lightly in the initial meters, then shamelessly putting my hand in my shorts and pulling the boys forward.
(Well, I say shamelessly, but I usually wait till no one is in sight, or at least not close by.)
I didn’t know Ed Hardy mixed with anything other than being a club going d-bag?
This is an interesting possibility:
http://www.internationaljock.com/core-suspensory,8503.html
Has anyone tried anything like this? It should at least get the boys out of danger of being sat upon, unless you are into that kind of thing.
Sit straight up with good posture. My friend also had this problem because he leaned very far forward while trying to learn.
Also try adjusting your seat back and forth.
what is the original purpose of this garment?
I was wondering the same thing, looks kinda like a testicular sports bra.
On a different thread consisting of a simlar subject a reader had fashioned an athletic sock with a hole near the toe end, into which he placed his manly bits. Then could pull on the sock to elevate said bits when needed when riding. I’m thinking the above device would accomplish a similar effect, without the worry of catching the sock on something during a UPD.