David Stone possessed me

David Stone, who presently has a personal article of mine, my unicycle, I believe is up to some voodoo activity of some sort. I suspect that he has in some way spiritually possessed either me or my Coker.

I was riding the big boy home yesterday and came to a point on the bike path where the cars can cross over to form a left turn lane. From left to right there is a left turn lane, a bike lane, and a traffic lane, all clearly marked. The bike lane is only about a meter wide but completely adequate.

I was about 30 meters from the intersection when the light changed. As I rode forward, an SUV in the left turn lane, making a sucking noise as if it were swallowing ten thousand dinosaurs through its intake manifold, started to make a “farmer’s” turn and drift into the bike lane. Now I had about half a meter or less so I smacked his (or her) rear passenger window HARD with my left palm. As he (or she) drifted FURTHER into the bike lane pushing me into the traffic lane (which was incidentally occupied by moving machines all of which weighed substantially more than a Coker) I smacked the window a second time. HARDER. I bruised the last joint on my left ring finger.

I don’t do things like that. Are we pretty much in agreement that this is David Stone’s fault?

Re: David Stone possessed me

>David Stone, who presently has a personal article of mine, my unicycle,
>I believe is up to some voodoo activity of some sort.

It’s traditional to retaliate. The voodoo “send a curse” feature is quite
effective

Sorry about the zombie driver. Maybe she was celebrating bike to work day?

David Maxfield
Bainbridge Island, WA

You should start riding with brass knuckles on. Breaking a window will make them stop, weither it be on top of you, or dead in their tracks.

Actually it’s not David who cast the spell. It’s his Coker, aka Roger. Roger is very upset. Ever since Pandora came to NY, David has hardly ridden Roger. I expect the curse will last a few more days until Pandora goes back in her crate.

Joe

You almost gave me a damn heart attack! Why in the world would you want to ride in the middle of traffic like that before the hub goes into production? Its not only your life you are putting at risk but ours too. There are too many tempting cliffs to ride off should something happen to you.

You do know that only one of you comes along every 100 years don’t you? Foss says this thing was built 100 years ago. Sense none of us has seen it; the dude probably died doing the same damn thing you’re doing, thinking only of himself. His selfishness went at a price of a bunch of people’s fun for over 100 years! Mine for almost 40! If you are going to continue to be selfish and ride your uni in the middle of traffic and put our future well being at risk, at least update the drawing with the new modifications!

Stone, take that Voodoo-hex or whatever it is off of Harper. I suspected it was the start of something after reading your reviews. Harpers near miss confirms it. If something happens to Harper (before the hub is produced) we are coming after you. Even though Harper in only thinking of himself, its still your fault

dan

Re: David Stone possessed me

harper.4t99y@timelimit.unicyclist.com writes:
>I was about 30 meters from the intersection when the light changed. As I
>rode forward, an SUV in the left turn lane, making a sucking noise as if
>it were swallowing ten thousand dinosaurs through its intake manifold,
>started to make a “farmer’s” turn and drift into the bike lane. Now I
>had about half a meter or less so I smacked his (or her) rear passenger
>window HARD with my left palm. As he (or she) drifted FURTHER into the
>bike lane pushing me into the traffic lane (which was incidentally
>occupied by moving machines all of which weighed substantially more than
>a Coker) I smacked the window a second time. HARDER. I bruised the last
>joint on my left ring finger.
>
>I don’t do things like that. Are we pretty much in agreement that this
>is David Stone’s fault?
Well, I will at least give you this: I have done what you described at
least a dozen times.

It’s never popular with motorists.

But then, being the victim of someone’s inept driving is never popular
with unicyclists.

David

Co-founder, Unatics of NY
1st Sunday / 3rd Saturday
@ Central Park Bandshell
1:30 start time after 11/1/01

Re: David Stone possessed me

That was a cute post, Dan, but I think you may have confused things. I
believe Harper was riding a different uni when he pulled his imitation of
me. I am currently the one riding uni.5…and NOT the wrong way in
traffic. Well, hardly ever.

David Stone

dan.4thua@timelimit.unicyclist.com writes:
>
>You almost gave me a damn heart attack! Why in the world would you want
>to ride in the middle of traffic like that before the hub goes into
>production? Its not only your life you are putting at risk but ours
>too. There are too many tempting cliffs to ride off should something
>happen to you.
>
>You do know that only one of you comes along every 100 years don’t you?
>Foss says this thing was built 100 years ago. Sense none of us has seen
>it; the dude probably died doing the same damn thing you’re doing,
>thinking only of himself. His selfishness went at a price of a bunch
>of people’s fun for over 100 years! Mine for almost 40! If you are
>going to continue to be selfish and ride your uni in the middle of
>traffic and put our future well being at risk, at least update the
>drawing with the new modifications!
>
>Stone, take that Voodoo-hex or whatever it is off of Harper. I
>suspected it was the start of something after reading your reviews.
>Harpers near miss confirms it. If something happens to Harper (before
>the hub is produced) we are coming after you. Even though Harper in
>only thinking of himself, its still your fault
>
>dan

Co-founder, Unatics of NY
1st Sunday / 3rd Saturday
@ Central Park Bandshell
1:30 start time after 11/1/01

Re: David Stone possessed me

in article mailman.1021689159.23900.rsu@unicycling.org, David Stone at
dstone@packer.edu wrote on 5/17/02 9:38 PM:

> It’s never popular with motorists.

Certainly true. Here’s how the driver of an SUV responded to a bike
messenger doing that in Chicago:
http://www.chicagocriticalmass.org/mcbride_main.html

> But then, being the victim of someone’s inept driving is never popular
> with unicyclists.

Also true. This is always a difficult situation. Having a choice of whether
to be run over by accident or on purpose is no choice at all. Fortunately,
even upset drivers don’t usually go into a murderous rage and run cyclists
down on purpose.

I don’t know what I would have done, there’s a good chance I’d do the same
thing Harper did. I probably would have yelled loudly as well.

I’ve got an AirZounds air horn on my bike which I use when necessary, but
that would be hard to mount on a uni. Of course, “when necessary” is usually
somebody about to pull out in front of me when I’m going 20+, a speed I
won’t have to worry about on a Uni for a long time to come.

-Carl

Re: David Stone possessed me

carl@peladon.com writes:
>> It’s never popular with motorists.
>
>Certainly true. Here’s how the driver of an SUV responded to a bike
>messenger doing that in Chicago:
>http://www.chicagocriticalmass.org/mcbride_main.html
Man, that was one scary article. I will think twice and even thrice about
that tactic again. Of course, it works pretty well when you’re in heavy
traffic – keeps those SUVs in their place.

David

Co-founder, Unatics of NY
1st Sunday / 3rd Saturday
@ Central Park Bandshell
1:30 start time after 11/1/01

Yeah – if they get outta line, just muscle 'em back over where they belong.

Whew. Quite a set of writings.

i was once a bike messenger myself.that article is way to familiar to me.ive had friends who where too.some of them are not available for dispatch anymore.

rest in peace ya’ll

M-4/pie-eyez

RE: David Stone possessed me

> I don’t do things like that. Are we pretty much in agreement that this
> is David Stone’s fault?

You were going in the direction of traffic, and you were neither eating
sushi nor talking on a cell phone (or both). Can’t blame David.

Though the SUV driver is the one in the wrong, he/she won’t get squashed as
a result of lame driving. Also it would be extremely unlikely for you to
even get such a driver ticketed. Your best defense is to ride defensively.

I suppose this would start with thing like not riding between two lanes of
car traffic. It’s not your fault if some insane traffic manager puts the
bike lane there, but you have to decide if it’s safe enough to ride in
there. It’s hard for me to picture the intersection, but I might be chicken
to ride in it (at least after your experience), and go around on the
sidewalk or something.

Or you try to be where cars can see you. I don’t know how the SUV didn’t
see you, unless you came up next to it and it did not approach you from the
rear. First reaction when that drift happened should be to hit the brakes
and try to not be next to it. Second reaction could be to hit the window. I
have a fat wedding ring, which might tend to crack the glass if I slapped it
hard… :slight_smile:

Stay on top,
John Foss, the Uni-Cyclone
jfoss@unicycling.com

“Vehicularly-Injured Sperm-Count seat: better known by it’s abbreviated
name, Viscount.” David Stone, on saddle preference