A rash of unicycle thefts has hit the Purdue University Campus! Actually, just
one unicycle was stolen, but I figure that’s at least 10% of the unicycles on
campus. I ride “Piece of Schwinn” that I’ve had for about 10 years. It has
been run over by a car twice (once with me on it, and once with me in the
car), dropped off cliffs, bent, abused, neglected, and now part of a major
crime ring. It is a fine machine that is so bent I can hardly ride it. But
much to my surprise it was stolen, presumably to be stripped down and shipped
to the flourishing Chicago unicycle black market (which by the way has some
very cheap unicycle parts). Actually, I didn’t even know that it was stolen.
At 7:15am on this saturday I recieved a call from the friendly West Lafayette
Police Officer. I was sure someone died. He politely asked if I owned a
unicycle. I replied, “I actually own 8”. He then proceeded to ask me if all 8
were in my possesion. I counted and only observed 7. I had left the old piece
of schwinn unlocked outside under the presumption that no would mess with it
last night. The officer said something to the effect of, “I confronted the
perpetrator with the unicycle, and he admitted to stealing it”. I asked the
fuzz if the guy rode off with
it. He didn’t laugh. Apparently some frat guys thought it would make a nice a
sourvenior, and then were dumb (and or drunk) enough to admit that they had
stolen it. I had gotten an ID tag for it as a joke, because who would ever
steal a unicycle? Apparently the answer is a group of roaming, intoxicated,
dumb frat dudes. I can prosecute them if I want, but I think I’ll let it
slide. So make sure you lock down your machines…the crime wave could
spread. Besides, someone has to furnish the black market!
Its a happy ending to a sad story…a recovered unicycle. Help take a bite out
of crime, lock up your unicycle
In a message dated 11/13/99 9:30:47 PM, you wrote:
> > Its a happy ending to a sad story…a recovered unicycle. Help take a bite > out of crime, lock up your unicycle
I used to lock mine up but my lock was cut; I found some kids trying to ride it
but no one admitted to it, of course. Wherever I go, it goes
w/me…fits in the grocery cart just fine.
> because who would ever steal a unicycle? Apparently the answer is a group of > roaming, intoxicated, dumb frat dudes. I can prosecute them if I want, but I > think I’ll let it slide. So make sure you lock down
Prosecute the bastards!
I really mean it. If you want more crime, let people get away with stuff.
I’m a theft victim: 1981 Miyata - First one sold in Michigan, Stolen in 1983
Boom boxes - 1985, 1988, 1990 stolen from cars Circus teaching equipment - 1988,
car window broken & locks damaged 1975 Beetle - the “Unibug”, containing the
above Miyata and my toolbox (see Unibug and Miyata inside: http://www.unicycling.com/unifoss/garage/bigwheel.htm)
None of this stuff was ever seen again. I hate thieves. Prank or no prank, they
should not get away with it.
In article <199911140229.VAA26731@shay.ecn.purdue.edu>,
Brett Bymaster <bymaster@ecn.purdue.edu> wrote: > …I can prosecute them if I want, but I think I’ll let it slide…
You could always tell the perp that you’ll do him a favor by letting him slide
IF he learns to ride a unicycle by some date (and offer to give him lessons). It
would be even more fun to get a judge to make that a sentence for the crime.
The last thing this world needs is another frat guy who believes he can go
through life using the “I was drunk” alibi.
>I used to lock mine up but my lock was cut; I found some kids trying to ride it >but no one admitted to it, of course. Wherever I go, it goes >w/me…fits in the grocery cart just fine.
And you lock it inside the grocery cart in case someone trys to lift (steal)
it, right?
Wayne van Wijk <wvanwijk@gil.com.au> wrote in message news:005201bf3959$b215a9e0$5e332fca@pavilion… > > -----Original Message----- > > >Better yet- make them ride one of those RED unicycles! > > > > > > With toe clips. >
At 06:49 AM 11/29/99 +1100, Wayne van Wijk wrote: >>> -----Original Message----- >>> >>> >Better yet- make them ride one of those RED unicycles! >>> > >>> >>> >>> >>> With toe clips. >>> >> >> And no seat… >>> > > > >… on Gerard’s 12ft giraffe.
with a bent rim and a flat tire and a loose chain ring …
>Better yet- make them ride one of those RED unicycles! >>> > >>> >>> >>> >>> With toe clips. >>> >> >> And no seat… >>> > > > >… on Gerard’s 12ft giraffe.
> > Wayne van Wijk <wvanwijk@gil.com.au> wrote in message > news:005201bf3959$b215a9e0$5e332fca@pavilion… > > > > -----Original Message----- > > > > >Better yet- make them ride one of those RED unicycles! > > > > > > > > > > > With toe clips. > > > > And no seat. > > >
and the uni backwards
>> > -----Original Message----- >> > >> > >Better yet- make them ride one of those RED unicycles! >> > > >> > >> > >> > >> > With toe clips. >> > >> >> And no seat. >> > >> >and the uni backwards > > >Down a steep hill > >Above a busy intersection >
>>> > >Better yet- make them ride one of those RED unicycles! >>> > With toe clips. >>> And no seat. >>and the uni backwards Down a steep hill Above a busy intersection
I agree with John Foss regarding your response to this theft. Prosecute. Don’t let your imagination of the perp. influence your decision. Even though this asshole is a university student (you’re sure of this?), he could well be a closet criminal - in fact, he is!
It is your responsibility to your community to prosecute this perp even if you don’t care much about the schwinn. Next time that jerk gets drunk and chooses to cut someones lock for a ‘joy’ ride, it’ll be someones beloved ride.
It might be uncomfortable for you to do this, probably why you’re talking yourself out of it, but TOUGH SH*T - this landed in your lap - deal with it like a responsible citizen.
Your write-up was very nice, by the way.
