Granted, it’s a perfect stranger; unfortunately, nobody’s perfect. 
I want Jessica Alba!
Granted, but she kills you and takes your money.
I want a lot of pr0n. FO FREE.
Granted, but all of it is old men and dead fish…
I want a cup cake.
Granted, but there’s alot of cat pee in it.
I want a unicycle.
granted but its made of cake with cat pee in and is completely useless
i wish i could have a kh29 with a geared hub and the whole thing works fine with no problems at all
Granted, but then its gets stolen by me only moments later. 
I want a copy of portal.
Granted, but it is the ZX Spectrum version.
I wish for world peas.
Granted, but then you discover you are deathly allergic to peas.
I wish for more hours in a day.
Granted, you now have 153 hours in a day.
Unfortunately this means you are on Pluto.
With no internet access.
Or air.
I wish my hair wasn’t going grey.
granted, now its not growing at all
i wish that there were no laws
granted, but you will now be hunted down by angry, jobless cops.
I wish to have nothing for the rest of my life.
wish granted but youll be completelly paralysed and blind
i wish it would snow here
Granted, but now you will live forever; that’s a long time to be bored with nothing at all. I don’t want anything.
Granted, but only in your bedroom! I wish I was 11 again so I could had enough time to really get good at unicyling!
Granted, but you have no legs.
I wish I could still hear out of my right ear.
Granted, but all you can hear now is Andy Williams “Moon River” 24/7! I wish I could get Angelina Jolie to marry me!
Granted, but its a she male look alike
I wish i could fly
you can fly, exept you fly into a jet’s turbine and die
i wish i were invincible
Granted, but I misunderstood you and now you’re invisible and ppl will freak out when they see a unicycle riding itself! I wish I could go back in time and meet Humphery Bogart.
granted but no one knew he was gay and now he analy rapes you
i wish i could land 1080 unispins