Unicycle-related deaths

Sorry to be so grim but I have just been
asked if anyone has ever died in a unicycle-related
accident. Well?

Arnold the Aardvark

Only from embarassment.

2 Likes

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

The day before yesterday was quite wet and I happened to run over a slug.
It must have died on the spot …
and I nearly died when I had to clean off the mess

Have fun
Franz

:wink: :wink:

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

My ‘guess’ would be that someone has likely been struck by an automobile
or fallen from a tight rope and been killed at some point in unicycling
history.

Jason

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

aardvark@removetubulidentata.demon.co.uk writes:
>Sorry to be so grim but I have just been
>asked if anyone has ever died in a unicycle-related
>accident. Well?
>
>
>Arnold the Aardvark

I heard about someone who died of a giraffe UPD. It seems he was near a
wall and was propelled into it, sustaining, I guess, fatal head trauma. I
believe it may have involved a tight space like an alleyway, so that his
fall was aggravated by the fact that his wheel hit the wall opposite of
the one he was falling into (and that’s what killed him).

John Foss, can you verify this (or at least having heard about this)?

David

Co-founder, Unatics of NY
1st Sunday / 3rd Saturday
@ Central Park Bandshell
1:30 start time after 11/1/01

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

On one rainy night, I had a UPD after hearing
the crunching sound of a snail meeting it’s maker
at the same time as it met my Coker, followed by
a slip on its remains.

Arnold the Aardvark

Re: Re: Unicycle-related deaths

Arnie,

I thought you were an athiest? Oops, I let religion slip into the thread didn’t I? Sorry, I repent. :slight_smile:

Bruce


Originally posted by Arnold the Aardvark :
On one rainy night, I had a UPD after hearing
the crunching sound of a snail meeting it’s maker…

Response
I thought you were an athiest? Oops, I let religion slip into the thread didn’t I? Sorry, I repent.


It is a little known fact that several species of snail are manufactured by the Coker Tire Company… Look in the catalogue.
:0)

Re: Re: Unicycle-related deaths

If you remember it from me, it comes from a story told to me by JeanPaul Jenack. I think it was a long time ago, and it was a performer on stage. He went to dismount from the giraffe by letting the wheel roll back, and he supposedly had clear stage behind him. But the tire hit a notch, or went into a hole, sufficient to stop it cold while the rider was in mid-dismount.

If this has never happened to you, it’s something you want to avoid. Your body is going downward with your full weight propelling it. If the seat suddenly stops, this shock can be transmitted directly to your spine. The way JeanPaul Jenack told it, the guy’s neck was broken instantly, and he landed in the audience, dead.

Now, he was well known as a teller of tall tales, so I don’t know if this ever actually happened. My guess is that you’d have to be on a giraffe over 6’ tall for enough damage to be done, and even then, the damage would be to your lower spine, possibly resulting in the worst-case scenario of being paralyzed.

Anyway, this is why I do not recommend rolling out the wheel behind you.

I can’t think of any unicycle-related deaths in which the unicycle had anything to do with the death. Being hit by a car while unicycling is a unicycling-related death, but at least the unicycle supposedly didn’t do anything to hurt you.

Stay on top,
John Foss

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

> Arnie,
>
> I thought you were an athiest?

Yes, but the snail wasn’t. :slight_smile:

This seems strangely appropriate:

“Curiously enough, the only thing that went
through the mind of the bowl of petunias as it
fell was ‘Oh no, not again.’”

Arnold the Aardvark

Re: Re: Unicycle-related deaths

And the last thing to go through a bug’s mind as it hits the windshield is it’s rear end.

Re: Re: Unicycle-related deaths

great quote!

"…a sperm whale had suddenly been called into existence several miles above the surface of an alien planet.
And since this is not a naturally tenable position for a whale, this poor inocent creature had very little time to come to terms with its identity as a whale before it then had to come to terms with not being a whale any more.
This is a complete record of its thought from the moment it began life till the moment it ended it.
Ah. . .! Whats happening? it thought.
Er, excuse me, who am I?
Hello?
Why am I here? Whats my purpose in life?..

…And wow! Hey Whats this thing suddenly coming towards me very fast? Ver very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding name like . . . ow . . . ound . . . round . . . ground! Thats it! Thats a good name-ground!
I wonder if it will be friends with me?

And the rest, after a sudden wet thud, was silence."

:smiley:

another:

“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks dont”

i am very sorry for straying off topic, but i couldnt resist quoting from one of the greatest books ever writen.

-Mike

sorry to go further off topic, but I think there is a quote that better fits the situation…I can’t remember it verbatim, but it was something like…

“Ford hoped and prayed there wasn’t a god, then, realizing the contradiction, merely hoped there wasn’t a god…”

i was not trying to make the quotes fit the subject, well sorta, but only cuz they’r from the same page as Arnold the Ardvark’s quote

on the subject of god:

"
The Babel fish is small, yellow and leech-like, and probably the oddest thing in the Universe. It feeds on brainwave energy recieved not from its own carrier but from those around it, It absorbs all unconscious mental frequencies from this brainwave energy to nourish itself with. the practical upshot of this is that if you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any language.

Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anhthing so mind-bogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see as a final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God. The argument goes like this : “I refuse to prove that I exist”, says God, “for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.”

“But”, says Man, “the Babel fish is a dead giveaway isn’t it? it could not have evolved by chance. it proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don’t. QED.”

“Oh dear”, says God, “I hadn’t thought of that,” and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.

“Oh that was easy” says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
"

What’s with the hitch hikers guide to the galexy all of a sudden? death to hitch hikers?

Obviously you havent read the book.

or maybe you have, and just dont apreciate it.

-Mike

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

“yoopers” <yoopers.arvfo@timelimit.unicyclist.com> wrote in message
news:yoopers.arvfo@timelimit.unicyclist.com…
>
> Arnold the Aardvark wrote:
> > *On one rainy night, I had a UPD after hearing
> > the crunching sound of a snail meeting it’s maker…
> > *
> > Arnie,
>
> I thought you were an athiest? Oops, I let religion slip into the
> thread didn’t I? Sorry, I repent. :slight_smile:
>
> Bruce

Hmmmm I suspect you mean’t slip into the tread, but who cares about typos
in here

Re: Re: Unicycle-related deaths

No, my mysterious friend, I meant slip into the thread, this thread on the newsgroup to which we are posting our responses.

B

Re: Unicycle-related deaths

“yoopers” <yoopers.au2db@timelimit.unicyclist.com> wrote in message
news:yoopers.au2db@timelimit.unicyclist.com…[color=darkred]
> > >
> > > I thought you were an athiest? Oops, I let religion slip into the
> > > thread didn’t I? Sorry, I repent. :slight_smile:
> > >
> > > Bruce
> >
> >
> > Hmmmm I suspect you mean’t slip into the tread, but who cares about
> > typos
> > in here *[/color]
>
>
> No, my mysterious friend, I meant slip into the thread, this thread on
> the newsgroup to which we are posting our responses.
> –
> yoopers - Bruce & Mary Edwards
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> yoopers’s Profile: http://www.unicyclist.com/profile/31
> View this thread: http://www.unicyclist.com/thread/20347
>[/color]

Ah well, never mind. but I think “our myseterious friend” was not being
serious there yoopers!!! :wink:

Muniuni

all ‘hitchhiker’ fans and non-fans, go read ‘cosmic banditos’ by a c weisbecker
we’ll chat later