what do you reckon? it’s the most fun essay i’ve ever written! (and essays are never fun!)
English Language Coursework Piece 2 LIZ 12LW
HAVE YOU SWUM IN THE WHEEL WORLD?
Every four months for the past three years I have and it has helped me improve my skills immensely and develop new ones and meet lots of new and exciting people.
Just to ensure that you are not stomping off down the path of swimming I had better direct you otherwise. If you were member of the ‘UUU’ then it is highly likely that at some point you have SWUM; I’m guessing by now that you are suitably bemused by these strange words that appear on the page before you, so I had better educate you a little on the subject. ‘SWUM’ is in fact absolutely nothing to do with the sport of swimming, it is in fact related to the very different and far more exhilarating, exciting, sport of unicycling. ‘SWUM’ stands for South West Uni Meet.
‘UUU’ stands for the UK Union of Unicyclists who organizes events such as SWUMs and sends out a twice-yearly newsletter to its members and offers a 10% discount off certain products on unicycle.com (the number one resource for unicycles/accessories and juggling equipment).
Let me tell you a little more about SWUMs; they are held at various venues in sports halls, (past hosts of the event have been Exeter and most recently, Ashburton) every SWUM has the same structure, but each is very different, with different people (as well as the regulars) and many new, exciting tricks on display. The general recipe for a SWUM is a mixture of games, workshops, competitions and levels testing, as well as free space and time to practice, there is also a section at one end of the hall for jugglers and people to practice other circus skills. Each SWUM begins with a warm up led by one of the more advanced riders, which involves riding round in a circle then at the command of the leader, performing tricks and skills; if you are unable to perform any of the feats then you just carry on doing the last one you could. After the warm up the room is spilt into sections with space to practice and a number of workshops right from beginner to expert, each led by an experienced unicyclist who teaches new skills. After the workshops it’s game time, for those who choose it. Teams are picked for unicycle basketball and unicycle hockey, (personally I much prefer unicycle hockey as it is a much more fast and exhilarating game than basketball). Other games played (with prizes) include, musical unicycles (a unicycle rendition of musical chairs replacing the chairs for unicycles), stuck-in-the-mud (on unicycles), slow races (the slowest unicyclist wins, but there are very strict rules) and last but not least, probably the most dangerous game played on one wheel, ‘gladiators’. To play gladiators everyone goes to the sides of the room against the walls then the referee shouts “1,2,3, GLADIATORS!” and everyone charges into the middle and tries to get as many people off their unicycles and on the floor as possible, using various methods of attack such as; riding behind someone, grabbing the back of their seat and yanking it out from underneath them (this is one of the most effective methods unless you try it on one of the expert riders who just laugh and carry on riding with the seat post dragging along the floor behind them). Other modes of attack include the basic ‘shove’ or the more violent (but exceedingly fun) option of grabbing onto some and swinging them round until they (hopefully) go flying off, however this method can turn against you and result in suicide. After the games is a little cool down period, followed by the announcement of UUU levels testing, open to anyone who wants to give them a go. The UUU (UK Union of Unicyclists) levels range from 1 to 10, with only 1 maybe 2 level tens in the world, the world champion himself, Kris Holm and renowned trials champion, Zack. Level 1 is very simple and requires only for you to mount the unicycle unassisted, ride 50 metres and then dismount gracefully. Level 2 is much harder and after that the difficulty of the levels increases very rapidly. The levels are not at all compulsory and are just there for a bit of fun, with certificates at the end and the option to try again at the next SWUM if you mess up the first time.
The brilliant thing about going to a SWUM is the wonderfully wide variety of ages and skill levels, right from little 5 year olds on tiny unicycles with L plates on, to 20, 30 or even 50 year olds who’ve been unicycling for years and certainly have the skills to prove it. However there are young unicyclists who are experts and older unicyclists who are just beginning; no one is ever made to feel left out and there is always someone ready and willing to lend a hand, be it to teach someone how to ride a unicycle or share tips on a challenging skill. As well as a diverse range of people at SWUMs there is also an equally ample array of unicycles; from freestyle (standard) to muni (mountain unicycles) to trials (durable unicycles with wide bouncy tyres for jumping off and on obstacles) to giraffes (tall unicycles used by performers with a chain to drive the unicycle from the pedals half way up the seat post to the wheel) and ultimate wheels (no seat or seat post just a wheel and pedals) and even impossible wheels (a tyre with a platform which swings either side, to ride this you set it rolling then run after and jump on with a foot on each platform). As well as this massive mixture of unicycle types there are also the latest weird and wonderful inventions from unicycle.com such as, unicycles with brakes (cheating if you ask me!) and giraffes with two or three wheels on top of one another of which the two wheeled variety is ridden by pedalling backwards to ride forwards), and any other strange and fascinating contraptions cooked up by the unicycle.com team.
So now that you’re a little more educated on the ‘wheel world’ you can impress people with your new found knowledge of ‘SWUMs’ and the ‘UUU’ and perhaps now you’ll think a little more when you see someone riding a unicycle and realise that there is far more to unicycling than meets the eye, there’s a whole world out there, which in my opinion and the opinion of many other fellow one-wheeled riders, is the wheel world…
