Trolling

Off-topic
1

If you really want to troll, and I mean really troll, then you’ve gotta do it right.

I’ll admit being entertained by most mom jokes. And when you can work a phallic reference into a post, that’s generally cool.

But to troll the same forum on a long-term basis without being struck down by the banhammer or blackmarked by other posters takes intelligence, skill and dedication.

A skilled troll will post things that appear to relate to the thread in which he posts. A skilled troll will not seem like a troll at first glance. It is the cumulation of his posts that may eventually–if ever–reveal him as such.

I won’t stand for all these thirteen year olds carelessly posting thinking they’re smart. This forum deserves better.

I’m all about the epic troll. Troll 2.0. The Renaissance troll.

One need not even crush the psyche of another to achieve these goals, to reach these Platonic ideal forms.

Personal insults are for the weak. I want to see a troll’s cunning through his posts. I want to envy this troll. I want to cry myself to sleep because I do not have the capacity to become this troll.

So far, I haven’t seen anyone who could be The Troll.

2

Why do you want a troll?

Weirdo.

3

You’re setting the bar too high for yourself… you’ll never see “The Troll” at this rate. “The Troll,” by your definition, wouldn’t respond to such obvious troll baiting… such is neither clever nor cunning.

To compound your problem, the best this forum has to offer is a load of “drive-by” posters… thoughtless trolling attempts at best. Even the forum’s elders have trouble outdoing the careless thirteen-year-olds.

Look elsewhere, lad.

4

Mmmm, interesting.

5

I’ve still got hope. Somewhere out there is the troll of my dreams.

6

Just like out there, somewhere, is the cheesecake of my dreams.

7

That’s right, I see it crisp and clear. Or what’s left of it anyway, on my plate(and under the table).

Ooohh, divine…

8

Have you tried under the bridge?

9

I like to troll with cut-plug herring on a six foot leader and about 4 oz of weight. Not much for flashers or artificial bait.

Hard to troll since we sold the boat though; going to have to work on that.

10

I prefer a chartreuse spoon with a copper back

11

I think I’ll just have a Martini, thanx.

12

Speaking of that, I was in Austin, Texas this summer. Austin has the largest urban population of bats. Several thousand live under the Capitol Street Bridge (like trolls–so technically, I am still on topic, but we will see how long that lasts). Hundreds of people come out every night at dusk to watch the trolls, I mean bats come out from under the bridge.

There is a hotel there that has a terrace where many people sit. The hotel’s signature drink is a black martini called a “batini.”