Stupid things on a unicycle

Ok, we all remember the first real ride we had, e.g. making it down the block, past the neighbors house, etc.

Who remembers the first really stupid thing they did after thinking they had mastered the one wheeled monster?

Mine was riding in heavy pedestrian traffic up by Broadway and Astor Place in NYC on my way to Washington Square Park. I was only a week or so into being able to ride significant distances; I couldn’t idle or freemount. I came to a very crowded corner (right past the barber shop where everyone went for $1 punk haircuts, for those old enough to remember the neighborhood and spent any time there) and had to stop suddenly. Well I couldn’t. I fell forward and banged into and just about pushed a woman out into oncoming traffic. Broadway traffic eats its dead, by the way. The woman wasn’t very happy as you can imagine.

The lesson for me was only half learned though. I stopped riding up to crowded curbs, but didn’t stop riding on crowded streets.

Raphael Lasar
Matawan, NJ

It was the lady’s fault, no doubt. All these “normals” not watching their direction of travel. I tell ya.

I have yet to hit someone. Hee hee. :smiley:

Hey JJuggle:

Yeah I did a pretty stupid thing once:

About 1 and a half weeks after I learned to ride my Uni, I went over to a kids house to show him that I could Uni… Just like him. We went across the street to a school where ther was a picnic table, oh, 3 feet off of the grond, leading to some muddy grass. He jumped off of it with ease. I didn’t pay attention to the technique, he hopped sideways. So stupid me… I go riding on the picnic table and ride off of it!! I thought it would be easy, but since I went staight off of it, and my face was BRIGHT RED!! :o <—That looked quite similar to my face if you know what I mean!! It wasn’t until then that he told me he had been doing it for 3 years, and he just mastered it.

This may not be that stupid, but I found it utterly stupid.


Thinking “hey, if I grab the seat and pretend it’s a pogo stick, I can hop up and down!”, and not thinking that a living room full of furniture might actually not be the best place to start…

Phil, just me

About a week after I learned to ride, setting off on a 10 mile ride with friend Bradley Bradley. We had a Schwinn 20" and a Schwinn Giraffe. I was amazed to make the first mile without a dismount, but after 5 miles (the turnaround point), our crotches were utterly destroyed. You definitely have to work your way up to such things, and we hadn’t. Those old Schwinn seats weren’t the best either, and we were probably wearing bluejeans.

So we ended up walking much of the way back, and finally when we were most of the way home, my brother happened by and gave us a ride the rest of the way.

The following year, Bradley and I entered the March of Dimes Superride, and rode our Schwinn Giraffes (still wearing jeans and without modified seats). This was a 75 km charity ride. We were the first to start (for about 3’ or so) and the last to finish. After that, we used big wheels.

Re: Stupid things on a unicycle

After riding for about 1 month (I still could not idle or turn very well) I
spent ALL of my money on a custom built 7’ uni. I felt pretty stupid as I
sat on top of it gripping the side of a building for dear life whilst being
too scared to move. I had just remembered that I was really scared of
heights - even low heights. What an idiot.

It took about 5 trips up to the top of the unicycle before I was brave
enough to let go of the wall and pedal the thing instead of climbing back
down to safety.

Wayne van Wijk

Re: Re: Stupid things on a unicycle

When I first thought of this question I really had in mind stupid as in “dangerous, especially to others”. But yours, Wayne, is quite amusing and yes, stupid! (Although I’ll bet that since you’ve put that 7’er to good use.)

My first experience on a giraffe was on someone else’s (I believe Anthony Shave’s, aka juggler133) 6’er. I got up and planted myself on the seat but realized a) that I was scared sh*tless and b) the seat was set just too high and while I could reach the pedals it was almost on tip toes and not very comfortable. I sat there for a while trying to figure out what to do. I was right against a post with a railing behind me too far down to comfortably step off to. After about 2 or 3 minutes I pedaled once or maybe one and a half times, far enough to get away so that the uni could slip out under me and back. I underestimated the impact of the fall and continued down smack dab onto my butt.

All this while my then 6 year old daughter was watching and laughing.

Raphael Lasar
Matawan, NJ

My stupidest moment came right after I got the uni out of the box. I was using a small barn door for support, while trying to get up and pedal forwards. (Kind of a stupid idea, the door ment I had to turn slightly all the time) My mum was helping my out. Suddenly, I UPDed and the uni slammed into mums leg!
After that, she still supports me, but from the safety of the livingroom window :smiley:
So JJuggle, your not the only person to have hit someone!

How does riding a giraffe feel?

Re: Stupid things on a unicycle

None too confident mounting my Coker, I still
did it in a crowded place. I fluffed the mount and
watched the Coker crash into a pram (occupied).
No harm done but that seemed pretty dumb to me.
Thankfully the kid’s mother seemed unconcerned.

Arnold the Aardvark

Mine is more funny than dangerous. I was in the midst of learning to freemount and was in the street in front of our house. The boys had taken off for a ride around the block and I was trying to mount up to catch up to them. As I jumped the mount, my second foot went foward, missed the pedal and I came down flat on my back in the street just as five high school students were driving by in their Trans Am. I could hear them laughing through the closed windows of their car.


Stupid things on a unicycle

I wasn’t watchin’ where I was goin’, and rode right into one of those slotted storm sewer grates… the kind with the slots running parallel to the curb. My wheel dropped in all the way to the bearing holders, the impact broke my big toe, and I got a jolt in the saddle that woke me up right quick… just in case the pain in my toe wasn’t enough. As in Bruce’s account, a gang of college students in a car passing me just as this happened laughed,… guffawed – loudly enough for me to hear through their closed windows. I was in too much pain to find it funny at the time. I probably would have laughed if I’d seen it happen to somebody else, though.

Hmmm… hadn’t thought of this before, but it was an entirely different kind of UPD… an UnPlanned Drop.

The stupidest thing I ever did was try to ride home from a social function aka drinking. I had been riding for about a year and even rode whilest modestly intoxicated before with no problem. But this time I could hardly walk. Thinking that riding would get me home faster I tried it. I did manage to freemount and got about 100 M and then leaned too far forward. I just rode it straight to the ground. Needless to say I sobered up enough to realise that I would have to walk home. Thank god I was drunk or it would have hurt far more than it did.

The subject of drinking and unicycling has come up before and I will not comment. However, I think it is worth noting that the above sentence is a masterpiece of multiple meanings (and interpretations).

Cheers (“bottoms up”???),
Raphael Lasar
Matawan, NJ

Stupid things to do on a unicycle… ummmm…

Crankgrabbing the walls surrounding the liberty bell museum was pretty dumb. The guard REALLY didn’t like that. Funny tho’ how tolerant cops normally are of unicyclists.
But thats not the most stupid thing I’ve done.
I would say the most stupid (funny) thing I’ve done on my uni was ride into a Duchess food restaurant and order a burger on my MUni. The really weird thing was that the waitress didn’t even seem to notice! She was pretty good about it and I didn’t get kicked out. I think I thoroughly amused a host of the elderly.

I didn’t have as much luck when I tried the same thing in Wendys though. They just weren’t quite as nice.

While I was on vacation in Florida I bumped into a cheerleading squad who were all interested in learning how to ride. I must have helped 4 or 5 of em attempt to mount. They didn’t get anywhere fast. I thought that that was pretty funny. :smiley:

When i was about 20mins into my first encounter with a unicycle, i said to my friend who could ride (us both heavily into free-ride biking) that if i got “that far” pointing to a drop on the side of someone’s driveway that i’d go off the drop. Well, next try i got “that far” it was about 50ft. And i rode off the drop, Tacoed the norco unicycle’s rim and fell down. It wasn’t even my uni!
I was like like: YAY! i can ride, SH@T! i broke your uni!

It was pretty stupid.