Ride the Lobster (category suggestions)

How about some more fun categories:

Worst Crash
Least Reliable Unicycle
Most Woefully Unprepared Team
Biggest Team Chemistry Meltdown
Least Able To Follow Directions
La Lanterne Rouge–the last-place finishing team

Now you’re getting into the spirit of my thread idea!

Eeek, I hope no one wins this.

Like, first non-flat-tire breakdown, or maybe most mechanicals on one cycle.

“You mean you trained for this race?!?”

I hope no one wins this, either.

“Oh we were supposed to bring that GPS thingy with us?!?”

Even last place in this race is something to be proud of.

There will be some spectacular crashes. A criterium with a whole bunch of short-crank Cokers and geared unicycles, and 100 riders who’ve never ridden in that format before? I may bring my MUni armor for that one.

The “Lanterne Rouge” is a quasi-official award of the Tour de France; as with RTL, finishing the TDF in last place is, itself, an accomplishment. There was a story that a rider had stopped under a bridge abutment to attempt to fall into last place on the last day of the tour; unfortunately for him, his competitor for last place was doing the same thing, on the other side of the same bridge.

Good idea.

Best / worst sunburn / suntan.

Best “helmet hair”.

Most vomit.

We should definitely keep a pictorial record of this one. I propose a end-of-day/pre-shower picture of each rider. It would be hilarious!

uniproshop sponsors awards

Hey guys,
Good news! uniproshop has decided to sponsor some special awards! This means that we will be handing out award certificates and a prize to a bunch of different categories. Don’t expect a huge prize because this is mainly for fun and to recognize some of the teams that might not have received anything. Actually most of the prizes will be silly, see below for examples. I’ve listed most of the awards we are considering although we might take out some of them or add new ones so these aren’t official. Feel free to let me know if you think I should add or take away any or if you have an idea for a small gift I could give, especially the ones with question marks!

Team Awards
-Fastest Ungeared Team (copies of defect?)
-Slowest Team (red bull to speed them up)
-Fastest All Girl Team (hairspray or makeup)
-11th Place ($5 since they were so close from finishing in the prize
-Oldest Team to Finish (some medicine of some sort?)
-Most Injured Team (band aids)
-Funniest or Most Entertaining Team (red clown noses)
-Youngest Team to Fin sh (bag of candy)
-Team that likes to Party the Most (6 pack of beer)
-Team with most breakdowns (spare tube or tools)
-Team that got lost the most (map)
-Friendlyist or Best Spirit Team (smiley face valve caps)
-Farthest Traveled Team (sudoku puzzles for long plane ride)
-Most Combined Years of Unicycling Team (?)
-Least Combined Years of Unicycling Team (?)

Individual Awards
-Oldest Rider (medicine of some sort)
-Youngest Rider (candy)
-Most Pimped Out Unicycle (?)
-Worst Crash/Injury (band aids)
-Person who had the most broken parts (spare tube)
-Person with the best sunburn (sun tan lotion)
-Hardest Working Organizers (?)

We don’t know the official time or date when we’ll be handing them out but it’s looking like Friday night at dinner. But might be on Saturday during the official awards (although awards could get kinda long). See ya’ll in less than a week!!!

oldest rider(s)-Geritol

I like this idea Jamey, it seems like a fun way to give other teams a chance for glory.

Dang! Now I really should have been in this!:wink:

Finally an award we know we can compete for! Totally Doable!

…and a gerontological study! John, American Mojo looks to be tied with you Centurions at 135 years combined age of riders! :smiley:

D@mn, you guys are ancient! :stuck_out_tongue: :wink:

Ancienter. The Centurions are 139, with 101 years of unicycling. That’s just counting the three riders of course.

Is Geritol still on the market?

So uniproshop did indeed hand out some special awards and prizes during the awards ceremony on Saturday. Sorry it took so long to post the results but I’ve been busy catching up with everything over the last week or so. I think the awards were a big hit and I’m glad uniproshop could contribute at least a little to RTL. Here are the results:

Team Awards
-Fastest Ungeared Team (4 copies of defect)

-Slowest Team (red bull to speed them up)

-Fastest All Girl Team (hairspray or makeup…sorry Andy!)

-11th Place ($5 since they were so close from finishing in the prize
YELLOW LINE FEVER (with only 2 riders the entire race!)

-Oldest Team to Finish (some reading glasses, arthritus medicine, joint medicine, etc.)
PUDGET SOUNDERS with 144 Years Old for Combined Riders Age (with THE CENTURIONS coming in a close second with 139 years)

-Most Injured Team (first aid kits)

-Funniest or Most Entertaining Team (glow sticks)
YAM POWER (with TEAM FLIRT coming in a close 2nd)

-Youngest Team to Finish (bag of candy)
2Y2D with 43 years combined riders ages

-Team that likes to Party the Most (a beer each)
OLD PECUILIERS with TEAM FLIRT (at least the support person) coming in a close 2nd and there was even one vote for 2Y2D?!

-Team with most breakdowns (spare tube or tools)

-Team that got lost the most (compass)

-Friendlyist or Best Spirit Team (smiley face stickers)

-Farthest Traveled Team (sudoku puzzles for long plane ride)
TEAM NZUNI travelling 9,533 miles

-Most Combined Years of Unicycling Team (muscle reliever medicine)
THE CENTURIONS with 101 years of combined unicycling experience

-Least Combined Years of Unicycling Team (balance bars to help the balance)
TEAM MANLY LEGS with only 7 years of combined unicycling experience

Individual Awards
-Oldest Rider (denture cleanser)
SCOTT ARNOLD from TEAM UDC at 57 years old

-Youngest Rider (candy)
EMILY MCCORMICK from 2Y2D at 13 years old with HYUN UK JUNG from TEAM UFO coming in a close second also at 13 years old but a little older than Emily

-Most Pimped Out Unicycle (tire shine to make his tire sparkle)
JIM SOWERS from YAM POWER with TEAM AMERICAN MOJO as a close 2nd with their custom red, white & blue Cokers

-Worst Crash/Injury (splint kit)
JOSEPH MYERS from PUDGENT SOUNDERS for busting his knee

-Person who had the most broken parts (spare tube)
The Korean who had a busted rim and frame…don’t have his name or team. Any help from someone that knows?

-Person with the best sunburn (after sun tan lotion)

-Best Support Person (lifesaver candies since they were lifesavers!)
and DARREN BEDFORD even though he wasn’t on a team he helped out lots of teams throughout the entire race

-Hardest Working Organizers During the Race (signed picture frame of all riders)
MARK (can’t remember his last name)
and a special thank you to HEATHER LEBLANC, ANNE WEDLER, EDWARD WEDLER, ALISON ?, NATHAN HOOVER & ANDY COTTER. In all reality all of these people should have received an award and signed picture frame. Thanks again to everyone for making this such a huge success!

Can someone help me out with Marks last name and address? I have to send him his picture frame and do not have his address so if you have it or his email I would very much appreciate it.

Till next time…

Jamey Mossengren

Attn: Jamie from Uniproshop Re: Ride The Lobster :wink:


Still haven’t figured out Marks email, phone number or address. Can anyone help me out? Please?? Pretty Please with Cherrys on top??