Possible new job and relocating dilemma

Off-topic
1

I’ve got to spill my guts for a minute to my loving, caring unicyclist community. I’ll just have a seat on the couch here and you all move the reading glasses to the end of your nose, sit back, cross your legs, and take some notes…

About a year and a half ago during my unemployment years, I applied for a paticular federal government job at the Veteran’s Hospital in Iron Mountain, MI in the grand ol’ U.P. and Mary’s former hometown. The position is a General Supervisory Engineer, a GS-12 position. After sending in my application materials, I was informed that the person currently in the position decided to hang on for awhile and the position was no longer open. So I wrote off the situation and moved on.

On Friday, I got a phone call from the VA Hospital saying that the position is open again and they would like me to resubmit my materials. Evidently at the time of my first application, I was one of their frontrunners for the job. I know it’s a bit early to make any assumptions, but let’s say I was eventually offered the position. Our question is, “Why now?”

A year and a half ago, both boys were at the point of moving up to the next school, it would have been a perfect time to make a relocation. But now the boys are fully involved in their new school activities. I’m not too worried about Brad, he is quite outgoing and has no problem being in public (almost to the point of embarassment sometimes…to his mom and dad. :)) Plus he’s younger and has more school years ahead of him. Ben on the other hand is more reserved and would possibly have to transfer in the middle of his sophomore year (interestingly, as did I when I was in high school). Plus, Ben has been fasttracking toward a possible soccer scholarship and has quite a few things working for him here.

But the job would mean a 37% pay increase for me plus incredible family and retirement benefits especially accented by my status as a veteran, not to mention that we would finally get to move back to the U.P. I’m sure we would all adjust and things would be great. I’m just looking at it right now from the side of the unknown. First things first as always, I have to be offered the job and at this point, it doesn’t hurt a thing to look in to it.

I just worry that maybe the effect on my family, especially my boys, over the next two years would overshadow the benefits of taking on this new job. I’ve got 20 years of my career left but Ben only has three years of high school left. Is it worth passing on an opportunity so Ben has the best opportunities? Does Ben have enough time to establish opportunities in a new location? Will a job opportunity like this come along again? Can I get up off the couch and go home now?

Bruce

2

No one likes disruption but transfering as a Sophomore is preferable over Junior and especially Senior. If you’re the front runner again take Ben with you to check out the schools, sports programs, etc. That way you’ll both have full input into whether you should move, or not.

Good luck.

3

this Army Brat moved … a LOT… all through the cold war and 'nam era.

Kids are malleable and adaptable. Unquestionably, your son will have a some seperation-loss issues when you move, but i’m certain that he’ll get over it once you have him settled in to his new digs. Losing out on a soccer scholarship kind of sucks, but there will be as-yet-undiscovered new opportunities awaiting him in the UP.

Better to move as a sophmore than a jr!

And besides, Iron Mountain is like 100X more beautiful than Rochelle Il.!

a 37% pay raise is pretty persuasive, and it sounds like a good, secure job. If you don’t want it, i’ll take it!! I love the UP.

Short version: a fatherly I’m sorry son but this is the way it has to be, and saddle up.

congrats on the opportunity.

.max
p.s. my uncle Fletcher is a retired Mi DNR warden in crystal falls and is/was a semi-retired real agent and a straight-up guy. If you need a contact to find a nice place to live, let me know.

4

Hello Yoopers,

My family moved about every two years and look at me. I can still ride a uni!

I can imagine some concern. UP seems rather isolated. These days that could be a good thing. There’s always the Internet to bring the world to your doorstep.

I love to see you guys talking about UP. My grandparents lived in Channing MI, (~between Iron MT, and Crystal Falls), lots of fond vacation memories for me as a kid.

Kids are resilient, good luck.

5

A very wise man once said “Happy wife…happy life.”

How do you like them apples.
:wink:

6

Wholeheartedly agree, the sooner the better. We know the area well as we’ve been there many times through the boys growin’ up years. Mary’s sister still lives there and whenever we vacation in the U.P., we always stay a night in Iron Mountain to get together with Mary’s old high school friends. The boys love the area, it’s just that they’ve not known living anywhere else but here. We checked out the schools and facilities somewhat already from my adventures in jobhunting a year and a half ago. They have good soccer…most important, you know.

I’m with you. My family moved every three or four years when I was growing up. This is the eighth state in which I’ve lived now. We were malleable as you said. Matter of fact, I have a lot of experiences now from different parts of the country that other kids don’t have. I think that makes for a more well-rounded person in a way. As far as the scholarship, like you said, who knows what exciting adventures and opportunities lie ahead.

Mary did her student teaching in Crystal Falls, by the way. And yes, the U.P. is 110% more beautiful than anywhere else on earth.

We go through Channing on every vacation episode to Michigamme. What a beautiful drive up I-95.

A very wise man, indeed. Mary was looking up real estate and housing options on the internet this afternoon. She’s excited about the possibility but not willing to admit that we’re on our way…which at this point, we aren’t.

Thanks, all, for your input. I feel much better now. Send me the bill.

Bruce

7

Take the job.
I will visit you next time I’m in the area :smiley:
(been up there a few times)
Cost of living is much lower there.
Each of you will reap different benefits, and losses.
But, all will be fine.

8

Call me peculiar, but I would have given an arm to live in the UP as a teen. What a great place to grow into an adulut. Take the position!!! Iron mountain is nice country, too!!

Congratulations!
Blake in PA

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Re: Possible new job and relocating dilemma

With the pay increase and the medical benefits, you could always take Ben for some social skills training (and soccer coaching). That way, he develops skills which will help him for the rest of his life.

I didn’t see anyone saying to avoid the move, though personally, I don’t have an opinion on that.

Best of luck!

Billy

10

Move. Kids learn a lot from change. Staying in the same place for the kids sake is the easy answer. Kids grow from adversity. Just like learning to ride a uni made them better, moving to a new area can have the same impact. My wife went to a new school her junior year, and some of her best friends to this day are a result of that move. The fact that she moved also gave us a whole lot more in common. Good things are born out of change. Our natural tendency is to avoid change, but sometimes it’s the best thing that could have happened to us.

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Wow, while I have no comment on Bruce’s tough decision, Chad, this is well said, succinct, and makes a lot of sense.

12

I grew up with some ‘turmoil’ in my childhood.
I can’t say that it was all positive.
But, I can say that I’ve learned to adapt quickly.
The biggest impact is that I have ‘learned’ to keep relationships at a distance.

13

I agree. Very well said. If I stop to think about it, it applies easily to me in the area of relocating. As I mentioned previously, I moved often while growing up and had to constantly change or adapt. Up to this point, I hadn’t given a thought to the life skills I silently learned through the process. Status quo can be a great excuse for a lot of things including laziness. Would be a great challenge and opportunity to mature, wouldn’t it?..I mean, eh?

14

Ben and Brad are two of the coolest kids I know. As you describe it, this sounds like a great opportunity for both of them. It sounds like a great opportunity for Mary. It sounds like a great opportunity for you. Maybe they’ll offer you the job maybe they won’t. If they do. maybe you’ll take it, maybe you won’t. Here, Bruce, do you want to be happy where you are or do you want to be happy somewhere else? You win. Congratulations.

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I have never met you, but if I may offer this comment…

Your kids are very lucky to have a father such as yourself who takes their conserns seriously when it comes to such a big life-changing decision. Its proof that no matter which way you go, they know how much their Dad watches out for them, and that overshadows in the long run any anxieties that moving to a new place might bring.

My wife is from France and I am from NYC and we have raised our two kids (aged 12 and 14) between the two countries all their lives and sometimes this meant huge changes in friends and schools, and every time, my kids were worried, and every time they did really well with the change. Kids are like that. In fact, right now they are worried about going to a new school because…well, it is very complicated, but because reasons XY and Z our plans for the fall had to change (medical reasons) and I have to enroll my kids in a school they know nothing about and they are both freaked out and thrilled by it at the same time. What remains constant is that their old friends will still remain their friends, and there are always lots of new friends to be found in new places–along with new oppurtunities to replace old ones.

Besides, in your case, with a 37% pay increase, perhaps you can afford to sweeten the deal for your kids–with some new unicycles!:slight_smile:

Good luck! It sounds like a really excellent thing–and the “U.P” seems really groovy, even though I have not the faintest idea what the heck it is!

16

All so true, Greg. Right now, it’s just a bunch of maybe’s. But I agree, whereever we end up, we’ll be happy and that’s a winner. Thanks for the encouragement.

I did mention to the boys that if we do end up back in the U.P., we’ll have to get some amenities…like some jet skis or four-wheelers or other toys that just don’t fit the woods and waterless terrain here in the flat barren wastelands of corn and soybean. I may even be able to afford that milking machine I’ve always wanted. (Challenge: What movie did that line come from?)

Sounds like you are with me on the moving experience. It’s nothing new to Mary and me but it would be a first for the boys. Yeah, it’s both exciting and scary at the same time. To wake up from our day-to-day rut and consider something like this kind of gets the blood pumping, doesn’t it. Very invigorating!

The U.P. or Upper Peninsula of Michigan has been likened to Maine, the only difference being fresh water vs. salt water. It’s an incredibly beautiful place.

Since this drama is being played out here, I’ll be sure to post back here from time to time with updates or decisions.

Bruce

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Re: Possible new job and relocating dilemma

Yeah, whatever.

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I’m kidding, of course. With the love and caring and dedication and respect you have to your family, no doubt you (as a family) will make the right decision. Or make the very, very best of a “wrong” decision. I never moved as a child (and didn’t move far as an adult), so I have no other input. Best of luck to you.

19

Bruce,
Saw your note and wanted to wish you good luck on whatever you decide. Thanks again for your help in getting us started with unicycling. I ride all the time now and Andy has learned also. Melissa is on to other things, but maybe one day…
Randy

20

Hey Randy,

Good to hear from you again. I know you’re familiar with job decision dilemmas. Give my best to Melissa.

On to other things? Seems to be a teeager trend. Some of that has landed here, too.

Bruce