No Unicycles! Or Else

A friend just sent me this link. Thought I’d share.

WHY :thinking:

It is a sign on the Appalachian Trail which is a hiking only trail. No MTB and obviously that means no unicycles either. Maybe they caught someone on a unicycle trying to be “smart” and claim that a unicycle is not a bike to avoid the “no bikes” rule.

Yeah, okay… but “Or Else” what?
Feed you to a bear?
Break your kneecaps?

I think I’ll contact the party stated as being ‘responsible’ for the sign…
ya’ know, the “Club with the best sense of humor” and inquire.
“Or Else” doesn’t sound all that humorous. Sounds like a rather unbalanced bunch, if you ask me.

they’re dumb. But can you blame them?
They’re hikers do some weird stuff.

That’s friggin’ hilarious! I’d LOVE to see a sign like that on a trail, assuming it’s not a legal cycling trail. I wonder if the group that had it made, paid for it, painted it and put it up, ever actually caught someone riding on the trail there.

What a great candidate for my future Things Not To Do page, if I ever update the thing… (ride on this trail)!

If it’s not a no-cycling trail… then it’s on my list for the summer :smiley:

well, I tried an olive branch, of sorts…

Dear DOC

While reading through the threads on ‘’ I came across a link to this picture:
and, while the caption mentioned your “being the club with the best sense of humor”, I have to question that statement.
The sign itself appears to have been attached to a live tree with what appears to be 5/16" x 3" lag bolts. I doubt the tree found that humorous.

But more to the point of my inquery, the sign doesn’t provide anything more than a thinly veiled threat.
Is there some existing legal statute that might have been mentioned if the sign had been posted by a less ‘humorous’ club?
Is the riding of a unicycle illegal, or is the mere possession of one in violation of “OR ELSE”?

Finally, if indeed your organization is (in some way) affiliated with as prestigious a school as Dartmouth, I would suggest you find a person who can rout two concentric circles in a plank.
Thank you in advance for your response,
Michael Conway

Or else they go cry about how pathetic they are while we own their trails.


You might fall off! The same group would probably think that’s just as funny.

Sorry, I still love the idea that someone went to the effort to make such a sign and put it up. Do they think nobody does it? Or that it’s so unlikely it will ever happen on that trail?

Is it indeed a cycling-legal trail, as Evil-nick suggests?

Just pointing out that Dartmouth was the model for the school featured in the movie Animal House. Not sure if any of the movie was actually filmed there, but I remember reading something to that effect. It could have been the work of a kinder, gentler present-day group of Delta House boys!

animal house was filmed in eugene oregon. is that Oregon or Oregon state? either way that’s where it was filmed in its entirety.

there, i set em straight!(check pic comments)

That is awesome! I love it. I just wonder what the motive was.

Set them straight with what? It’s the Appalachian Trail, a world famous hiking trail that goes 2000 miles from Maine to Georgia. It is not open to bikes or unicycles.

If you did ride on the Appalachian Trail I think there are a few people here who would personally dismantle your unicycle for being such an ignoramus.

A family friend walked the entire Appalachian Trail last year. Quite a feat. Most who try do not succeed.

I’m not one who likes trails being closed to bikes and unicycles for no reason, but some trails are hiking trails and meant to be hiking trails. There is room on the planet for hiking only trails along with MTB and unicycling trails and ORV trails.

And yes, I find the sign funny. Especially since it is stating the obvious that the Appalachian Trail is not open to unicycles (or bikes).

there, i fixed your post for you

ahhaah i wanna make a sign saying “only unicycleing or else” then put it on a mtn B*ke trails…LOL

Assuming that is where the sign is situated!

While it’s true that the movie was filmed at UofO, the inspiration was from Dartmouth’s Alpha Delta Phi fraternity.

Frankly, public-school fraternities aren’t nearly as obnoxious as those filled with the children of the wealthy at places like Dartmouth. (Although they’re still obnoxious).

Thanks, John Childs, for doing the duties on the latest incarnation of this thread.

Be a good neighbor, and stay off hiking-only trails, no matter how many loopholes you discover in the wording. It’s not easy.

Looks like it is!