Newbie needing help here..

Howdy folks… I’m new to the wonderful world of unicycling and have a
quick question. It’s a little personal and i hope i don’t offend any one
by my language. So ladies ya might want to cover your eyes… Well it
seems as i practice riding i have one uncomfortable problem with my seat.
As i ride (or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how
can i put this nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat. There it wasn’t
easy to ask… but it keeps happening. Is this common problem?? which i
obviously hope not… Is my posture incorrect?? what do i need to do to
correct this issue. ( i do plan on having kids someday ) Any help would be
greatly apprecicated…

Timm

Have you tried cycle shorts, or a bit of positioning as you place yourself on the seat? I seems to be natural once you get used to it.

Innes

Timm wrote:
> As i ride (or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how
> can i put
this
> nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat.

Cycling shorts will make a big difference. You’ll still need to manhandle
your plums into the most comfortable position from time to time, but once
there they’ll stay there for a while, at least until you’ve dismounted a
few times (each time you dismount they’ll slip a bit).

Even if you don’t bother with cycling shorts, at least avoid jeans. That
thick seam under your crotch is quite uncomfortable, and Betty Swollocks
can become a serious problem. Each time you adjust your position on the
saddle, you’re likely to find scrotal skin sticking painfully to itself.

If you can freemount, I strongly recommend learning the side mount
http://www.unicycling.org/unicycling/mounts/sidemount.html ). With the
standard mount, you effectively slide onto the saddle from the rear,
sweeping the family jewels underneath you as you go. With the side
mount, you swoop gracefully backwards onto the saddle leaving your
nadgers out in front.

(I wonder how long I can go on before I run out of euphemisms for
knackers).


Danny Colyer (remove your.mind to reply)
http://www.speedy5.freeserve.co.uk/danny/danny.html “The secret of life is
honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made” -
Groucho Marx

Timm <timmcken@netscape.net> wrote:
< atale of “personal” discomfort >

  1. Cycle-shorts - no underwear should be worn with them.

  2. Adjust just after you’ve mounted.

  3. Some people swear by a little vaseline (to reduce chafing)

  4. Some other people swear by talcum powder (for the same reason)

  5. If you try #3, and you use a muscle rub (eg “Deep Heat”) make sure your
    hands are really clean before you apply the vaseline.

  6. Practise. As you get better, you find yourself better able to adjust
    position to improve your comfort.

Paul

Paul Selwood paul@vimes.u-net.com http://www.vimes.u-net.com

I have found the most discreet way of moving inappropriately placed body
parts is to mount the unicycle saddle with all of your soft bits at the
front. As you slide back into the seat your testicles should stay towards
the front and be out of harms way.

Good luck with the future family :slight_smile:

BTW - don’t worry about the word testicles, it is a medical term and
should not be offensive to anyone on this list.

Wayne van Wijk wayne@jester.com.au


Visit www.jester.com.au for Entertainment, Workshops and Circus Supplies


>As i ride (or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how
>can i put this nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat.

I’ve been riding for about half a year now and initially this was a “big”
issue for me too. Previously I tried to unconspiciously grab my stuff and
pull in the right place, but as time has passed I have found that my nuts
have become more tolerant to the abuse. I don’t know if this is medically
acceptable but I don’t plan on having more children anyway :slight_smile:

What also matters is the shape of the seat. My daughter’s unicycle has a
shorter and more curved-up seat and this really aggravates the problem …
err, if I ride it, that is. The Semcycle with standard seat that I own is
a lot better. Actually, I think that in general unicycle seats could have
less curvature; it might be better for going into and out of seat-out or
ride with stomach on seat (all of which I don’t master yet, though). Has
anyone ever experienced a tendency to fall off front or rear?

Finally, on mounting. Danny Colyer had a good description of a problem I
also had with the standard mount, sort of “rolling forward” (ouch). A
side-mount is one solution. Alternatively, and a lot easier to change to,
is to place the seat prior to the mount not centrally in your crotch, but
in the groin. I place it in the groin of the leg that is first on the
pedal but that may be just personal preference. It prevents the initial
painful rolling and after that it is self-adjusting. I don’t know how
this works but apparently my balls have learned to unicycle just as my
legs have…

Klaas Bil

“To trigger/fool/saturate/overload Echelon, the following has been picked
automagically from a database:” “Pentagon, United States, tank”

>Howdy folks… I’m new to the wonderful world of unicycling and
>have a quick
question. It’s a little personal and i hope i don’t offend any one by my
language. So ladies ya might want to cover your eyes… Well it seems as i
practice riding i have one uncomfortable problem with my seat. As i ride
(or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how can i put
this nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat. There it wasn’t easy to
ask… but it keeps happening. Is this common problem?? which i obviously
hope not… Is my posture incorrect?? what do i need to do to correct this
issue. ( i do plan on having kids someday ) Any help would be greatly
apprecicated…<

You know, I wouldnt worry too much about the language (unless you get
really graphice) because as were all unicycle riders, this question has
popped up more than a few times Im sure. Personally, when I ride my
unicycle, I go right ahead and move my “junk” out of the way with my hand.
A bit crude and cave-man like, but hey, its worked so far. I suggest just
trying to figure out the best position to sit in, to avoid any nut
squashing.

Johnny T :smiley:

I agree move it out of the way… or what is more common is to land above
the seat and then ease yourself into it to the seat slowly to avoid
problems. If you watch men mounting a unicycle they jump then wiggle in to
the seat to settle - sometimes with a tug to assist things.

Roger


The UK's Unicycle Source <a href="http://www.unicycle.uk.com/">http://www.unicycle.uk.com/</a>

----- Original Message ----- From: <MoNKeYSPaZ@aol.com> To:
<timmcken@netscape.net>; <unicycling@winternet.com> Sent: Thursday, April
26, 2001 6:55 PM Subject: Re: Newbie needing help here…

> >Howdy folks… I’m new to the wonderful world of unicycling and have a
quick
> question. It’s a little personal and i hope i don’t offend any one by my
> language. So ladies ya might want to cover your eyes… Well it seems as
i
> practice riding i have one uncomfortable problem with my seat. As i ride
> (or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how can i put
this
> nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat. There it wasn’t easy to ask…
> but it keeps happening. Is this common problem?? which i obviously hope
> not… Is my posture incorrect?? what do
i
> need to do to correct this issue. ( i do plan on having kids someday )
> Any help would be greatly apprecicated…<
>
> You know, I wouldnt worry too much about the language (unless you get
really
> graphice) because as were all unicycle riders, this question has
> popped up more than a few times Im sure. Personally, when I ride my
> unicycle, I go right ahead and move my “junk” out of the way with my
> hand. A bit crude
and
> cave-man like, but hey, its worked so far. I suggest just trying to
figure
> out the best position to sit in, to avoid any nut squashing.
>
> Johnny T :smiley:

Hey folks thanks for all the advice… Seems i need to do a little man
handling coupled with bike shorts… I can just hear the comments at the
park now…

a little boy " Mommy why is that man playing with himself while sitting on
that funny looking bike thing??"

Oh well… but at least there is a solution to the whole nutcracker issue.

Timm

“Timm” <timmcken@netscape.net> wrote in message
news:9c9caq$ml7$1@pyrite.mv.net
> Howdy folks… I’m new to the wonderful world of unicycling and have a
quick
> question. It’s a little personal and i hope i don’t offend any one by my
> language. So ladies ya might want to cover your eyes… Well it seems as
i
> practice riding i have one uncomfortable problem with my seat. As i ride
> (or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how can i put
this
> nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat. There it wasn’t easy to ask…
> but it keeps happening. Is this common problem?? which i obviously hope
> not… Is my posture incorrect?? what do
i
> need to do to correct this issue. ( i do plan on having kids someday )
> Any help would be greatly apprecicated…
>
> Timm

Timm wrote:
> a little boy " Mommy why is that man playing with himself while sitting
> on that funny looking bike thing??"

If at all possible, I can recommend riding with a certain UK unicycle
obsessive (his friends will know who I mean). No-one’ll take any notice of
you discreetly adjusting yourself while he’s standing there with both
hands down his shorts applying liberal quantities of Butt Buttr :wink:

(I think perhaps he only does it when there are no non-unics around
though)

BTW, while looking round the archives I found a song that I wrote a new
verse for years ago about this problem - see
http://www.unicycling.org/unicycling/hypermail/0413.html


Danny Colyer (remove your.mind to reply)
http://www.speedy5.freeserve.co.uk/danny/danny.html “The secret of life is
honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made” -
Groucho Marx

MoNKeYSPaZ@aol.com wrote:

> practice riding i have one uncomfortable problem with my seat. As i ride
> (or attempt to) i always seem to crush/pin one of my umm (how can i put
> this nicely) nuts/testicles against the seat.

> You know, I wouldnt worry too much about the language (unless you get
> really graphice) because as were all unicycle riders, this question has
> popped up more than a few times Im sure. Personally, when I ride my
> unicycle, I go right ahead and move my “junk” out of the way with my
> hand. A bit crude and cave-man like, but hey, its worked so far. I
> suggest just trying to figure out the best position to sit in, to avoid
> any nut squashing.

Well, crass as it might seem, I do the same thing. I’ve found that if you
position your sensitive areas right before mounting, they generally stay
in a comfortable position and you don’t crimp them. Probably looks awfully
rude for people watching. Maybe that’s one of the reasons I don’t like
people watching me ride? <grin>

Greg

> > more than a few times Im sure. Personally, when I ride my unicycle, I
go
> > right ahead and move my “junk” out of the way with my hand. A bit
> > crude and cave-man like, but hey, its worked so far. I suggest just
> > trying to figure out the best position to sit in, to avoid any nut
> > squashing.

Or you can use the front of the unicycle to push all dangly bits out of
the way as you mount it. Just start with the seat a bit behind you and
push it between your legs as you jump up onto the uni. Works for me and
nobody seems to be offended, as both my hands are on the uni. Then again,
this doesn’t work for freemounting a 6 footer, which is one of the many
reasons I’ve never been able to freemount the damn thing.

Jake Cooper