Mock article about unicyclist

The Onion” is a satirical newspaper that appears in NYC each week. The end-of-the-year edition included their twenty best short articles of 2005. This short originally piece ran in the July 26th Onion:

Media Ignores Cancer Struggle of Champion Unicyclist
Key West, FL

While seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong’s battle with cancer has been well-covered in the media, his counterpart in the more insular world of unicycling has garnered very little attention. “Three-time Tour de Farce champion Nick Ienatsch’s battle with mouth cancer is no less real than Armstrong’s, and he should be considered just as powerful a symbol of triumph,” said Mitch Boehm, editor-in-chief of Unicyclist magazine and Ienatsch’s biographer. “He may be a wobblier, somewhat less-dignified symbol, but inarguably, one of hope.” Ienatsch, known for his brash, outspoken manner and his smokeless-tobacco sponsorship, claims he is not a hero. “I’m just fighting cancer as any other human-powered-vehicle enthusiast would,” he said. “Be he bicyclist, unicyclist, recumbent bicyclist, or pogoist.”

I was laughing so hard as I read this, I almost fell off my unicycle. [Funny coincidence, really.]