Infomercials

Off-topic
1

As my daughter ages, she is up less frequently at ungodly hours of the morning. However, on those occasions when she does awaken early she often goes downstairs and watches infomercials. She claims to enjoy them.

For those of you not blessed to live in a land with 500+ channels, on 24 hours a day and for which there is insufficient “quality” programming, infomercials are simply 15, 30, or even 60 minute long commercials for products of questionable quality, efficacy, and value. They are usually on between 5:00 and 8:00 AM.

What is so fascinating about them is the amount of enthusiasm the “real people” hawking them can muster. The excitement with which they extol the “deflabberizer”, “the salad spewer”, or “spray on hair” is just amazing. I truly find myself admiring them. I mean, usually I can barely work up even a fraction of that enthusiasm to sell my wife on some romance. Or a new unicycle.

Usually when my kid is watching them and I happen upon her, I try to get her to switch the channel to some sex or violence; something more wholesome and with versimilitude. :wink:

Cheers,
Raphael Lasar
Matawan, NJ

2

Apologies for this post. I thought I was in Just Conversation.

Raphael Lasar
Matawan, NJ

3

Chef Tony kicks but!!!
he can give more abuse to his knife than I ever will in ten years! And he can slice a pineapple in thin air!

I’ve actually considered buying the thunderstick pro from the infomercials…have any of you bought the thunderstick or the miracle blades?

4

“Set it and forget it” now for only 4 easy payments of 29.99

Wait Ron! now if you call within the next 5 minutes we’ll take off one of those payments for you.

I love that show!

5

I like The OxyClean guy. He’s funny. He’s a moron who sells oxyclean. An oxymoron. HAHA!

6

Ya my neighbor had some of those miracle blades and they are very sharp. After halloween I was helping them chop there pumpkins and they went through them like nothing of course i cut my self in the process(damn motorskills) but all in all they do work pretty good.
Brian

7

Boy, those blades are sharp kent arent they?

Irresponsibly sharp Brian! Woops there goes my thumb, hahahaha(audience laughs).

8

Why, Ron, that’s a human head in that rotary cooker now isn’t it?

Yes, it is, this thing can cook everything, and on top of the rotary cooker, you can steam vegetables at the same time, even eyeballs like I have here.

I like that crazy dude in the weird yellow suit with the red afro and the big shoes, they should put him on a unicycle sometime!

I came up with some idea’s that I want to sell, but don’t know how to go about it, maybe someday you’ll see me doing infomercials for my products. (has to do with hacky sacks)

9

Re: Infomercials

u jest
i have this money-making scheme that’s been bubbling in my head for quite a while now and that’s to make porn-movies in the style of infomercials
(“…and that’s not all! if u KEEP moving like this…”)
thoughts?

while on the subject of infomercials, u might enjoy this
the word ‘priceless’ springs to mind

:slight_smile:

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Re: Re: Infomercials

Dave, you are WICKED!
It does, however, give a whole new meaning to the phrase “Don’t try this at home unless you own the Thunderstick PRO”. :wink:

Jayne

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Re: Re: Infomercials

I saw that on some funniest videos show! Oh man, that was sooo funny…