Sooooo, these two girls are sooooo annoying (not even close to as annoying as me). They constantly come to my door with these little routines that they cook up and will ignore any request to leave even from my mom! As the subject says, I was trying to think up a fun and non-harmful way to get them off my doorstep. I repeat, this isn’t like call the cops, it’s something fun like a squirt gun or something. What do you think? If I pull off any of your suggestions I will try to get video. Watcha think? 
squirt gun…definitely. or, if you have bushes by the front door, you could hide in those with water balloons, or a bucket of water, or just a really huge super soaker, or something…yeah, something with water or some other type of liquid is your best bet. make sure to get it on tape!!
What girls? Neighbors? Relatives?
Girlfriends?
Neighbors, and definitely not girlfriends!!! 
Offer them a kiss.
noo, that’s too cruel!!
Hey tyler,
Hide in the bushes with a big water gun (preferable not water balloons cause they can bounce off of your target). Then have your mom go answer the door with a video camera. Shabang, you’ve pulled a sweet prank and have it on film for us. Or you can setup a tripod in you house and your mom can drench them too! That would be sweet!
you remind me of Calvin, and they remind me of Susie Derkins.
Right, well, the most effective way would be to just lock the door and ignore them, they’ll get bored and give up (trust me, it works).
However, its more fun to do something like the squirt gun/water thing or…
For that type of stuff I use Tyler Cox be gone!
Say it like this: TylerCoxbegone!
Thank you sir I will use that advice in the future.
use a huge super soakers or some how make the door handle shock you when you touch it like your mini slot machine…
Yeah! Wire the door knob, and when they come yell “the doors open!”
Zap!
Sit in the bushes and record it! I want to see them jump when they get shocked!
Use an all-natural squirt gun. You know, the one in your pants, and I garantee they’ll never come over again.
Re: Human pest removal… 
Yes, aren’t we girls annoying with our logic and right ways of doing things? I predict in another couple years, you’ll be worried more about how to smuggle them in your back window. But for now, the kiss-kiss advice above is the best. I predict if you follow Catboy’s advice, your lawyer dad is going to be doing some pro-bono work.
Well?
Show them a picture of your dad shaving his breasts
Hook the hose up so its pointing at your door and just turn it on. Much better than a squirt gun because it doesnt stop:D