I have practiced around 20 hours, and still cannot ride the unicycle. I am in shape, young, and have decent proprioception, yet I still cannot ride. I’ve reached the end of the internet, and still do not know where my balls are suppose to go while trying to sit on the damn thing. (I’ve looked at many beginner videos, and in all of them, it looks like the rider is sitting directly on his balls. I start to wonder…are all seemingly male unicyclist androgynous?)

Biker shorts? No thanks. It isn’t like my balls would be enclosed in some sort of invagination; rather, they would still be pressed against, for sitting on the seat is to sit on my balls.

Surgery? No thanks. I enjoy my male characteristics.

So…HOW do you sit on a seat that is rediculously and inappropriately shaped like a banana, without damaging your balls?

Should I just try and learn the impossible wheel–or is it possible to hold one’s self up with hands on seat and buttock partially seated?

Re: How!!?!?

Yes, and work on your vocabulary while you’re at it.

Proprioception is a good word though…I’m gonna start using that one.

As for the seat, just pull your balls out from under your ass…it’s no hard thing to do. Set them in front like a nice little package. It’s really the most obvious of solutions.

due you dont just plop onto the seat and expect it to be fine… you must appropriately adjust your pakage before sitting or yes there will be pain. but if you just adjust and accually wear biker shorts then youll be fine

edit: HistoricalGoof beat me to the punch


Look at this link.

Re: How!!?!?

wow, even with the proprioception?? that surprises me. usually the proprioception helps everyone learn to ride.
as for your nutses, you don’t sit on them. when you’re sitting on a chair, do you sit on your nuts? nooo, you sit on your BUTT!! which is what you should do here. but not quite, more like between your butt and your balls, which I believe is called the gooch if I remember right.

Gooch? It’s called your “Chodum” or “Chode” (slang). I’ve never heard of a Gooch.

As for the topic, spandex bike shorts do help. They’re amazing, because they support your 'nads. All you do is put the shorts on so that the crotch is tight to your body, pull your 'nads as high as you can get them, and let the spandex hold them there.

I was a little wary when i started jumping down stairs and only wore boxers, but now i wear spandex shorts under a loose-shelled pair of shorts, and i’m fine.

yeah, I think it’s called a chode too…but also a gooch.

For more constructive help, please describe the unicycle and saddle you are using. If possible, look around at places like for pictures of similar ones.

It took me way more than 20 hours to figure it out, and look what I was using!

Re: How!!?!?

Grab everything in one hand, hold seat in other hand. Place seat underneath you, still holding everything with other hand. Sit down, and let go of everything. ‘everything’ should be now resting on the front of the seat, NOT underneath you.


I hang mine over the front of the seat.
I still have problems from time to time, but the “balls bumper” is the best solution I’ve found so far.

Just practice suicide mounts. They’ll flatten out after a while.

A quick way to adjust is to pull the seat from behind and, like was stated before, situate your package out from under your rear.

this is officially the most hilarious post in the forums. it’s funny cause i get this same question from alot of people who try to ride my uni. and i tell them what you’ve all said, you just have to adjust properly. can’t stop laughing at the post though. perfectly legitimate question btw, though interesting over-use of the word balls. try to switch it up next time.

what you do is you get a bread knife…

no, seriously, just get on with one leg and balls on one side and one leg on the other side. to start with it’s a twisting motion to get it all in posiyion.
after a while riding you won’t think about it. it’s like playing guitar, to start with your fingers are sore but get up to standard and you toughen up

stright back, look stright ahead, and you’ll be just fine…

Are you holding the uni fowards or backwards? Do you know?


I actually do not use bicycle-shorts or any other fancy kind of clothing. Normal jeans or baggies do the job for me, as long as I know that my boxer “keeps it all in place”. I think that there are lot of induvidual preferences here and you just have to find what works for you.

The trick is simply to either, as said, adjust everything to one side, or to get it to lie in front of you on the seat. If you just jump on the unicycle, “it” will be in the wrong place. Things will start to gety better as your technique increases and soon you will only hurt yourself this way veru infreqently. I don’t think I’ve hurt my crotch (except when falling) more than once since Christmas.

I wonder what you did on christmas…


I always thought that part of the body was called a “husk.” I first knew about this expression “husk” because I had some friends who had a rock band up in Albany New York during the early 80’s, and they called themselves “The Husk”. When I asked them what it meant, they explained what a “Husk” was.

They also made it clear that they were referring to the female anatomy, thus the two circles in their band’s logo (see below).
I know, some may think it is vulgar, but I think it is funny to name your band after such an…interesting part of the body…

Sorry for going so far off topic–I know it has nothing to do with the important question of where nxixcxk should put his balls.


I always understood that a chode was a reference to a male’s anatomy in the case that it’s wider than it is long, i’m guessing that this is a fairly rare occurence in men that haven’t suffered some kindof industrial accident but ‘chodicular’ is still a great adjective to use at will. As for nxixcxk’s balls, just hold the saddle slightly underneath u, rest them up at the front and then sit down behind them, avoids any kind of manipulation with your hands being necessary, whcih is always a bonus when riding in a pbulic area.