hellen keller jokes

know any good ones? i gotta bunch

Why did Helen Kellers dog kill himself?

You would too if your name was inahamif!

:smiley:

How to you punish Helen?

Mount doorknobs on the wall.
:smiley:
How come Helen Keller masturbated with one hand?

CAUSE SHE MOANED WITH THE OTHER!!!
:smiley:

How did Helen Keller burn her ear?

She answered the iron.
:smiley:

How did Helen break her arm while driving?

By trying to read the stop signs.
:smiley:

Why was Helen mad?

Someone kept leaving the plunger in the toilet!
:smiley:
How do you torture Helen Keller?

Give her a basketball and tell her to read it

I agree.

That first one you posted is so much less funny when you read it.

Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver?
Because she was a woman.

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house?
Neither did she.

Whats the worst present Helen had received?

Rubiks Cube.

How do you get Hellen Keller to shut up?

Give her mittens.

Okay, now I’m through. These jokes are horrid!! cries

I don’t know if it has been posted.

Why does hellen keller wear tight pants?

So you can read her lips, oh yeah!:smiley: …more like:( :o … I am ashamed of myself.

What did Helen Keller’s parents do to punish her for swearing? Washed her hands with soap.:smiley:

ewwww…

LOL!!!:smiley: :slight_smile: :astonished: :smiley:

Cool, Brendon, a new low after the Ecstasy thread. I was wondering if you could pull it off. Using this forum to push cheap, adolescent shots at perhaps the greatest hero of the disabled over the internet might qualify.

yeh i know i didnt think i culd do it either but i did it, whheeeewwww i did it and man was it alot of work. thanks for the kind words. I’d like to thank ala, budda, baby jesus, my mom, dad, and all the little people i had to step on to get here.

It’s not dissing Keller.
The jokes are just funny (to some people) because they’re so horrible.

I’m queer and find fag jokes hilarious.
What’s a fag bring on his second date?

What second date?

How do you get four fags to fit on a stool.

Turn it upside down.

Yeah. The only way my mind can keep me alive and somewhat sane is laughing and stuff even though I shouldn’t. Like when I laughed at the holocaust video… Its my escape from everything, I tend to keep it that way.

This one doesn’t really make sense cuz if she’s deaf, she wouldn’t know if the phone was ringing.

haha. funny stuff guys.

These jokes are mean.

no. there funny. get over it.

yes they are, but there funny, learn to laf

I find humor in many things.

But not when they are at the expense of another person.

EDIT: (in most cases)

Like for instance in this case, I dont find the jokes funny. Helen Keller had a severe disability, and I do not find that funny.

i am for once ,with harper on this one

This is a really long rant, if you care to read. Yes I did get carried away. Start the rant.

Lighten up. Her disability wasn’t funny, but that isn’t what the jokes are
about. OK yes literally, but I mean in a philosophical sense here. Comedy is not always literal. At the root of all comedy there is tragedy, I thought this was known. What is funny and what people laugh at are two completely different things. People get these two separate things mixed up all of the time when they really shouldn’t be, it is just plain ignorant. I laughed at many things about the holocaust because my brain can’t comprehend what happened and still stay sane. What could be the fix? Laughter. It lightens up the mood and makes everything seem not so real, at least for me. I laugh at many things, funny or not. A good example would be when I had a ball shot right in my face granted it did hard and make my eyes water, I still laughed. I find many situations are just better when you laugh it off. If these offend you do not read them it is really simple. People like myself are not super human we can only take so much at once or over a period of time so we strive to find humor and laugh, even if no humor is there to be found. If it wasn’t for my ability to do such things I would be in terrible shape at this point in my life. I know a kid who got beat many times by his drug addicted father, what does he do? He laughs about it so he can go on with what he has to do. This kid laughs at terrible experiences like nothing, the reason this is a way to deal with them. Sure they sucked and were horrible, but that time is partly over for him so why not laugh it off over lunch?

End of my rant.