Epic Ride by the River Thames

Now it’s my turn to spout forth about a little ride of my own.
Last night I got home from work, it was nice & sunny & there had been rain in the morning. Time to get a little muddy.

I set out for the local Reservoir turned nature reserve after a glass of Champagne to celebrate my daughter coming back from holiday. With the sun setting I had decided to go for the most challenging off-road route starting within a 500 yard radius of home. Mainly a very narrow path with lots of areas brushed by nettles & brambles. Some very tricky riding where inaccuracy would be rewarded with pain! (or worse case a long slide followed by a dip in the water!)

The mud was dry enough to gently tickle my calves but not stick as I rode along to the sounds of birdsong (plus the un-noticed cars & aeroplanes). I only got stung once and there were a couple of moments on some tree roots but nothing I couldn’t handle (imagine swanky voice). The worst moment was when a Wood Pigeon was startled by me & startled me back! The best moment was the whole damn ride.

I got back, cleaned my Onza Muni for the first time (Can’t really practice inside with mud on the wheel, can I?) and had some more Champagne, followed by a great meal at a local restaurant.

What a lovely evening.


Distance ridden: 3-ish miles

Time Taken: 40 minutes

Total Height Climbed: at least 4 metres, maybe even 5 (due to River Thames Flood defences)

Steepest gradient: 1:4 over 6 whole metres

Highest heart rate: yes

Most entertaining comments received: quack quack quack, and tweet tweet tweet.

UDPs (what does it stand for anyway?): NONE!

Largest Obstacle ridden over: 6 inch diameter tree stump, raised a whole 3 inches out of the ground

Disclaimer: this is a bit of a spoof of those amazing rides I enjoy reading. There’s no mountains, no 5 hour rides or ‘deserts’, just my best ride yet. I’ve only been riding less than 3 months, got 2 Unis already and I love it. In a couple of days I’m off to North Wales & The Lake District for 2 weeks and hope to escape whenever I can!


No need to downplay your write up as a “spoof”. It’s a nice write up of a ride you enjoyed. I see a unicycle as something that takes you out to see bits of the world you wouldn’t notice otherwise. There’s more to unicycling than riding the unicycle. Your write up will inspire someone whose longest ride so far is 1 mile to aim for 2 miles. It will inspire someone else to ride their local river bank for the first time.

Glad you enjoyed it.