Bruce Jenner's problom

Off-topic
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I was class of '76. It was the bicentennial. Ra Ra USA, USA. Red white and blue everywhere, even on the black people. And never more so than when USA so kicked ass at the Olympics with the most macho man walking. He made Chuck Norris chuck. World’s greatest champion. Bruce Lee started to refer to himself as Brucie. In a class by himself, he actually was able to teach Americans what the decathlon was . Now that Iv’e put my flag down and cooled off, I can’t tell you what the decathlon was, There was a lot of disgusting discussion in the lead up to Bruce kicking a Russian ass throwing a poorly designed Frisbee. Then he cleared the last few hurdles, sprinted down the last dash, and then I, and all Americans, shared the greatest country on earth, with the greatest macho athlete of all time.

And then 30 years passed, and most riders here are convinced FTL is on another nutty rant. WTF is a decathlon? Trust me, it was huge in '76.

So 30 years later, then came the Kardasians. World champion attention whores of all time. Honestly, I still think Paris was hotter, but my perfume line has not sold well lately either. It’s a competitive world. Kim kicks ass. They don’t even remember your name, all they remember is Kim’s ass.

So what is Bruce Jenner to do. Die remembered as Kim’s unphotoed forgotten step dad?

No ! Bruce will go where no man has gone before. Joan Rivers would have advised against even trying. Before giving him her frequent flyer plastic discount coupons. On her grave , can’t take them with her. Take them Bruce.

This is now Bruce’s challenge. Become a greater attention whore than Kim, at least as hot a girl as Paris Hilton, and find a better plastic surgeon than Joan River’s had at age 65.

Being a patriotic american who truly believes that having my ass kicked by a 65 year old woman would suck, I will post only one more offensive comment.

I still think Paris Hilton is hotter than Kim and Bruce’s new goal will be harder than setting a world record in the Olympics. How hard ? A lot harder than his dick will be when they turn it inside out to be a pussy and shove it half way to his ass. So hard that his next big gig could be standing next to Melissa Rivers at the red carpet, while he plays the role of Joan’s cadaver.

I apologize to any trans gender people on the forum, as well as the other 3 people that read my posts, if my comments seem offensive. Just saying, it’s Bruce fucking Jenner. He’s set the bar mighty high for this one.

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@_@

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I only hope you’re referring to on the forums entirely when you say that, and not just in this thread.

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Are you high?

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If Bruce Jenner is the all time greatest attention whore, then why hasn’t he/she taken up unicycling? And don’t you think Kim Kardashian’s butt would get more attention on the seat of a unicycle? Anyone on the forum tired of continually “protecting the family jewels”? Bruce Jenner, show us the way!

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You make some valid points. Few here have not thought that having their balls surgically removed could potentially be less painful than their current riding experiences. I’ve had my days, you did to, I hear you bro.

Still, Kim on a uni seat , I just don’t know. Kris (not Kim’s mom) KH, does not make an extra wide. I kinda agree with you, he should.

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If it weren’t for Bruce Jenner, I don’t know if I would have ever learned what a Decathlon is.

Seriously. Can’t the Olympics manage an upgrade to the discus? It seems so old-fashioned. But then again, I guess you want to have something that’s hard to throw beyond the infield of an athletics track…

Maybe it’s because her name is so hard to spell?

I hate to admit it, but I’ve heard a lot of this story in the background as someone who lives in my house (will remain nameless but is not me or my dogs) watches that stuff. I’m pretty sure the Kardashians are engineering the publicity of Bruce’s changes. They are geniuses at that kind of stuff!

Because unicycling does not get you that kind of attention. Sure, you get noticed because you’re riding a unicycle, but that’s it. Suddenly nobody cares about your personal stories, you’re just that, uh, person riding a unicycle.

And no, unfortunately I don’t think Kim’s butt would get more attention on a unicycle, but I’d like to see it anyway. :slight_smile:

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Elpueblo that is hilarious. BTW his name is Caitlyn.

Caitlyn.jpg
Caitlyn.jpg800×450 66.3 KB

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I agree with most of your comments

Especially John’s about how the Kardashians will have this professionally managed. I mean, from that photo, it appears he has not only found Rivers plastic surgeon, but Kim’s photo shop guy as well. Truly, better than I expected.
I can’t wait for the reality show to start, so I can not keep up with him, er her, along with not watching the Kardashians.

Only slightly off the subject, it’s not about ass or Jenners, but this clip is pretty cool. It starts off a little slow but then becomes funny.

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As usual, it’s pretty hard to get the aim of your gibberish, FTL. Just want to had my 2 cents and waste a little brain time.

Difficult to argue against that, indeed. They are, though succesfull, pathetic… just like a bitter old man trolling a unicycling forum with BS, in my opinion (before you ask, I’m not tallking about Billy, I love him and he’s been here for ages)
Before pointing the straw in Kim’s *ss you might want to pull the beam out of yours…
Just saying.

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You’re right. The standard quote from non-riders is “look at that unicycle.” Darn, I am going to have to start wearing my clown costume while riding. Then maybe they’ll say, “Look at that clown on the unicycle.”

I did an internet search on “trolling”. One article suggested the primary motivation of the troller was to “make itself the main topic of interest or discussion”. In other words, to be an attention whore.

I found the original post funny, nevertheless, and apologize, to anyone offended, for “feeding the troll.”

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At first, I did not understand the relavance of your question

Because I was high.

In the Florida Keys Haze strains of sativa that will not mature until late December, are doable. The quality cannot be replicated indoors with lights, nor outdoors because of frost damage north of my location. Nor by importation, as compression (necessitated by the economic necessities in smuggling), damages the product. Like piss in your chardonnay.

I can’t help you achieve my level of highness, I am sorry. I suggest you move to Boulder, CO. The uni, juggling, street performing scene when I was last there was amazing. And I hear Nevil’s Haze can be legally purchased. I am very sorry that the price is 600$/oz. That is because it can only be grown properly in a tropical outdoor climate.

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Is Cannabis and unicycling a common combination?

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street performers try to be different

That said, I was the only one of 12 at the Halifax buskerfest in 91 that didn’t have a 6’ uni in his act. I did learn how to ride one though, I just liked to keep my bag of tricks small and easy to carry. I think if you juggle well enough and are funny, you don’t need that many props. Comedians make the most money.

And yes, after a couple cups of coffee, getting high and practicing in the mourning for a few hours, then doing shows, very few performers would turn down a hit on a joint. I’m not saying they were all stoners, like some were absolutely barbaric, preferring cigarettes (ugh). Most of us drank beer to, but only the losers would do it before a show. Uni, juggling and street performing seem to be the the coffee, eggs and potato combination.

Personally, I didn’t prefer to perform while high, but for many of my friends, they went in blazing. It makes me to self absorbed, you need to focus on the second ring( the audience). Getting high makes me more of a one ring circus. Great for practicing, but not so good for shows.

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Not without some Doritos nearby. :sunglasses:

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Before a uni ride, I enjoy a nice glass of carrot juice, some fruit and yogurt, a few cups of yerba mate, and a couple monster vape hits. A healthy stoner is a happy stoner. :slight_smile: