Beginner's Riding on the Street Skill Levels

Level 1.

  • Mount unicycle with assistance from wall/car/unsuspecting passer-by.
  • Ride 50 meters.
  • UPD ungracefully before being run over by passing car.

Level 2.

  • Smile at non unicyclist on the left
  • Smile at non unicyclist on the right.
  • Ride in between 2 people walking along the pavement totally oblivious to anything going on around them.
  • Have 8 stock replies to “Where’s your other wheel?”
  • Find a route that has no curbs that you need to ride off.
  • UPD ungracefully infront of someone on your left.
  • UPD ungracefull infront of someone on your right.

Level 3

  • Demonstrate 3 replies to “Do you belong in a circus?”
  • Ride with a figure 8, waist measurements smaller than 1.5m.
  • UPD without faceplant.
  • Ride on an empty stomach for 10m.
  • Make sharp (emergency) hand gesture to the left.
  • Make sharp (emergency) hand gesture to the right.
  • Swear 5 times.
  • Ride over a non unicyclist’s foot.

Cathy

Thanks Cathwood. I had been kind of depressed that I would never make it to Level 3, only to now find out I’m already there!

Might need to party tonight in MR to celebrate…

Might I propose a level 4?

-dismount gracefully when nobody is looking.
-dismount ungracefully just in nick of time to avoid hitting a pedestrian.
-turn 90 deg. to left or right without understanding why it happened.
-demonstrate 4 different styles of arm flailing.
-demonstrate importance of helmet and/or wrist guards to non-unicyclists.
-consistantly UPD but be able to catch the unicycle before it hits the ground.

Obviously, since they are my levels and I am the only tester, I’ll just have to come over there to assess you (just to make sure). Now if you could just supply the ticket …

Cathy

Fantastic.

Cathy

This is a very clever funny thread. It makes me feel so good after hearing about the one footed wheel walking and 360-unispins on the threads in RSU!

thanks for the smile!:stuck_out_tongue:

I think that’s why I did it. All those accomplishments in the what I’ve accomplished in the past year thread made me feel totally inadequate.

Cathy

Funniest thread for ages. I really did LOL.

Can’t give you rep until I’ve spread it around, but it deserves plenty.

Excellent.:smiley:

Thanks Mikefule.

Cathy

Here’s
Level 5

  • Sucessfully negotiate neighbourhood dog/dogs.
  • Demonstrate bucket of doggy doo collected from wheel/trousers/shoes on various rides.

Cathy

This is great news… I have renewed hope :smiley:

Thanks for the chortle Cathwood! I think I’m somewhere between level 2 and 3, unofficially of course. And thanks to underdog for the supplemental guffaw from his excellent level 4 list, too.

Podzol, I agree here. Hearing the 14 yr olds reporting their backwards upside-down blindfolded hand wheel-walk after 2 months practice puts what I’d come to regard as my own gains into rather stark perspective.

So would riding and chewing gum at the same time fall somewhere in Level 4 or 5?

Probably depends where it gets stuck when you spit it out.

Cathy

Also

  • Successfully turn up volume on MP3 player

Cathy

Re: Beginner’s Riding on the Street Skill Levels

“underdog” <underdog@NoEmail.Message.Poster.at.Unicyclist.com> wrote in
message
news:1cf15a9886176fd5ebbae3e90b357298.20cv5g@NoEmail.Message.Poster.at.Unicyclist.com
>
> Might I propose a level 4?
>
> -dismount gracefully when nobody is looking.
> -dismount ungracefully just in nick of time to avoid hitting a
> pedestrian.
> -turn 90 deg. to left or right without understanding why it happened.
> -demonstrate 4 different styles of arm flailing.
> -demonstrate importance of helmet and/or wrist guards to
> non-unicyclists.
> -consistantly UPD but be able to catch the unicycle before it hits the
> ground.
>

I sort of touched on this thread a few weeks ago, but did not have Cath’s
inspiration to take it to these levels. You may remember my writing the
following, which includes one of the level 4 skills

" The path had a number of large and muddy puddles following the recent
monsoon like weather, but these were not to prove a problem for me. I
dismounted and edged carefully around them (I think edging is one of the
less well known level 4 skills )."

As one gets more experienced one can use this edging skill to avoid the
doggy poo too. It is a fairly advanced variation and should not be attempted
without either instruction ( available at a modest fee) , or a liberal dose
of insanity, of which I have enough to supply several patients…
Note: this skill does NOT work with a Mikefule tree root, any attempt to do
so will result in a UPD well before entering the forest.
If there is enough interest I may be able to make an instructional video,
provided I can borrow a camera from the BBC.

Another L4 skill is the ability to UPD several hundred yards from the
nearest vertical structure. This is a bilingual skill and can also be done
in metres.

Nao


The human race is a species so incredibly intelligent that it has invented
Gods to explain anything it does not understand…although my friend Dave
says no amount of Gods will ever explain how a bra can be removed without
disturbing the T-shirt.

Wow! You can ride with an MP3 player? :wink:

I don’t know, but it could be followed up in a higher level by “choke on gum or other snack while riding, and successfully perform heimlich maneuver on yourself (while riding optional).”

These fun levels would make a great article for the next On One Wheel…

Slightly more tentative:

Level 6

  • Demonstate 6 mounts without losing contol and scraping nearest car with metal pedal.
  • Run away (backwards) if you fail this.
  • Discover unicyclist.com.
  • Post at least one post asking what unicycle you should buy.
  • Email unicycle.com (or local alternative) at least once.
  • Buy fleet of unicycles and have them delivered to work (if you can’t ride them, at least you can impress/amuse your colleagues).
  • Show various unicycle scars on your left calf.
  • Show various unicycle scars on your right calf.
  • Demonstrate ability to purchase unicycle shorts that make you look like a pink elephant/Russian ballet dancer.
  • Purchase at least one unicycle t-shirt.
  • (For men) Demonstrate ability to arrange ‘lunch box’ via the David Stone method.

Cathy

That’s a great idea! Go for it Cathwood! Try to get some of the young arty types to do some black and white illustrations, too.