It saddens me to say that brother Lia Phat can no longer bear this burden that I happly take up. His words.
Dear honoured colluge:
It is with a heavy hart that I contact you. As the nephue of Lia Xio the Povinchal Governer of Nangon I hold the position of official lurker of the Unicycling forum.
Let me explaine. Last year My Uncle the Governer was contacted by A Great American Scientist to produce in our villages factories a Wonderuss Device capable of propelling a unicyclist at great speeds. This was seen as a great boon to our province which has been stricken by drout For The Last 7 Years. We were assured that the Wonderuss Device was highly prized in the west, and that each would be worth Tens of Dollars, or more.
My Uncle being A Brave Man and Visionary decided in his wisdom to use the funds set asside for our provinces annual food subsidy to finance the production of 50,000 of these Wonderuss Devices. Saddly, we have not heard again from the Great American Scientist. It is said that the Scientist was lost on expidition to the remote Moab desert of the United States and has not been heard.
As Winter threatens to come down to the mountains and my Esteamed Uncle has be sequestered to the Central Prison in Beijing it has fallen on me to procure funds to feed my countrymen. Having lurked on this forum for many months I know you to be of kind hart and magnagimus nature and so it is that I am able to propose to you In Total Trust this offer. Were you to open an account with the Central Bank of Hunon for the amount of only 7000 US dollars, I would be able to send all 50,000 Wonderuss Devices to a Destination Of Your Choice. As we are without unicycles these Wonderuss Devices are useless to my people. Your generousity would allow my countrymen to servive until the Spring Showers that Must Shurely Come.
We await your reply and prepaire instructions for the transfer of funds as well as futher details of the True Nature of the Wonderuss Device.
The Love of the People of Nangon are with you.
Provinchal Lurker of Nangon
A blessing to you from the People of Nangon Province