Unicyclist Community

Go Back   Unicyclist Community > Unicycling Discussion > General Unicycling Discussions

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 2006-07-24, 07:41 PM   #1
Mikefule
Bridge of Otherwhere: on Kindle
 
Mikefule's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Long Bennington, Lincolnshire, England.
Posts: 7,168
A serious clearance issue

Everything's going well: I'm on the Coker, I've ridden from the car, across the field, all along the river bank, over the suspension bridge, along the embankment, down the little twisty passage under the road bridge, and made it over the zig zag footbridge and then finally reached Beeston Marina - five miles without a UPD.

At the marina, everyone was friendly. I was asked sensible questions. I'm starting to feel like a local celebrity - "That's our unicyclist. Comes through here regularly. Goes everywhere on it, you know...."

Then I've gone all the way tround the nature reserve, up and over the trickiest hump-backed footbridge of all in the steeper of the two directions, and I've made it back to the marina without a UPD. The only minor problem is a slight twinge in the left knee.

From the marina, I made it along the road, and up and over the fiendishly difficult cobbled bridge, up onto the top of the flood bank, then I earned gasps of amazement as I swooped down the steep grassy bank onto the football pitch.

And now, I'm ambling along at a steady 8 mph or so, the path empty, insects buzzing, massive dragonflies everywhere, the sweet smell of rosebay willow herb in my nostrils, and the happy sound of children playing in the cool waters of the river down to my right. The sun is out, the sky is blue, and the only cloud to spoil the view is that my left knee is twanging a bit, and my foot feels like it's badly positioned on the pedal.

Then a particularly clever brain cell has an idea. In fact, more likely than not, a few disgruntled brain cells got together around the water cooler - maybe the sort of brain cells that control something unglamorous like peristalsis in the lower bowel. And now one of them has had an idea - an idea that could earn him his ticket to a cushy posting somewhere exciting., like the frontal cortex...

Of course, proper procedure is to get all ideas checked and ratified to ensure a consistent approach within the remit of the mission statement, but this little clique of brain cells knows that the only result of that would be for someone else to take the credit. Either that or the idea would be changed beyond all recognition by committee, implemented way to late and with an inadequate budget - and then who'd get the blame when it all went wrong?

So this is the time for the brain cells to be bold, to show they can make a difference, make a name for themselves. They bide their time, until the supervisory brain cells are away, looking at a heron on the other bank of the river, then they make their move...

Quickly, they remove the left foot from the pedal, and flex the left knee, figuring that by the time the knee has flexed a couple of times, the pedal will have come back round so that the foot goes straight back on in the right position. Brilliant!

Except it doesn't work like that. There's a reason why new ideas have to be approved by senior management - because other departments might be involved. On this occasion, it is the UPD Department, followed by the Sprinting Department. The Department of Swearing and Expletives also has quite a lot of input.
__________________
My first novel, Bridge of Otherwhere, Michael Wilkinson, on Kindle. A tale of subtle magic, mystery, friendship and love. Tinyurl.com/Bridge-of-Otherwhere For US$ page: TinyURL.com/OtherwhereBridge
Mikefule is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2006-07-24, 08:00 PM   #2
Sgaterboy
LITTLE PUNK
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Key West, FL
Posts: 140
. . .If it makes you feel eny better, your life isnt ruled by any of those committees anyway. Its governed by the secretary of Fate.
Sgaterboy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2006-07-24, 08:41 PM   #3
BungleBanks
Southend Juggling Club.
 
BungleBanks's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: essex u.k.
Age: 35
Posts: 184
mikefule

see>? this is what i mean, mikefule can write about any drivel whatsoever and meke it really bloody interesting!

he needs to write a book! a book of unicycling stuff.
Bungle
__________________
Readin' my signature yeah?

www.southendjuggling.com
BungleBanks is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2006-07-24, 08:43 PM   #4
cathwood
Life's a beach
 
cathwood's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Prestatyn
Age: 53
Posts: 3,687


I'm going through the process of learning advanced 'changing foot position with waffled shoes on pinned pedals' moves. Whilst desperately trying to wiggle a foot into a more comfortable position I frequently have images of the foot flying off the pedal and having a similar UPD. Not happened yet but ...

Cathy
__________________
Cathy
cathwood is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2006-07-24, 09:04 PM   #5
trials_uni
Trials and Muni Rider!
 
trials_uni's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Hamilton, Ontario. Canada
Age: 30
Posts: 3,689
Your write ups are always so fun...Acctually i almost didnt read this one because of the title...I thought it was about tire/frame clearance( a subject i kno nothing about..Im glade i read it.
__________________
TRIALS 4 LIFE !
Check Out The Newbie Guide
And the Spline Maintenance Guide!<UPDATED!!!With Video
Quote:
Originally Posted by BillyTheMountain
Hey thanks! The unicycle community needs more people like you, willing to out Bike Suprematists and stand up for the rights of unicyclists!
I'm puttiing you in for an Award at NAUCC!
trials_uni is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2006-07-24, 09:20 PM   #6
onelesscar
I get places on 75% fewer wheels
 
onelesscar's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Irvine / Modesto
Age: 32
Posts: 1,130
haha...it was hilarious! This is the first story of yours I've read, and I loved it.
__________________
Now a self-employed world traveler.
onelesscar is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
clearance, issue, serious


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Clearance Sale. juggle508 General Unicycling Discussions 10 2005-06-02 06:20 PM
KH 29 Clearance shadowuni General Unicycling Discussions 4 2005-04-27 08:14 AM
Mud clearance leow General Unicycling Discussions 8 2002-06-05 02:10 PM
Tire clearance on a 20" miyata Dan Heaton General Unicycling Discussions 2 2001-09-04 11:22 PM
MUni Tire Clearance-- How much do you need? Chris Reeder General Unicycling Discussions 2 2001-06-11 11:04 PM


All times are GMT. The time now is 06:29 AM.


Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2001-2016 Gilby
You Rated this Thread:
Page generated in 0.06119 seconds with 11 queries